Growing Up or Going Down?
by Blaze.09
Summary: Growing up with the boys could be fun...or at least it would be if Joey wasn't in love with her best friend, Sodapop.
1. Little Joey

Thanks so much for the reviews guys. It really motivates me to write faster.

angeloves1Why thank you! ) That's very sweet of you. I'll try not to let you down by messing it up now.

kaligirl05Gosh, I'm sorry. I just remembered the name from a friend I had in school and put it down. It's a very pretty name. ) I changed it for my story because that could get really confusing for all the readers. Thanks for being cool about it.

outsidersfan5790Thank you too! I'm working on the next chapter right now. I just needed to fix a few things on this one but now I'm on to the next. You can expect something really soon. I'll try not to let you down.

(This Chapter has been re-done and re-posted.)

Joey's POV

When I was eleven, my father passed away. I was devastated but my mother took it worse than I did. She wouldn't even look at me for weeks. Things just weren't looking up. She started drinking, one thing led to another, and now we had to leave our home.

That's how I got to Tulsa. We moved into a slightly run-down house on the East side of town. It didn't take me long to learn about the never-ending soc versus greaser war.

Living on the eastside, I was a greaser. At the time I thought it was horrible. Greasers didn't wear pretty things like I was used to and I just couldn't accept it. My father bought me all kinds of expensive things when he was alive and I intended to wear them no matter what anyone said. Of course I really didn't know that I wasn't supposed to wear them anyway. Not really.

I met my enemies in Tulsa long before I met my friends. The socs thought I was trying to fit in and the greasers thought I was trying to be better than them. Lose-lose situation.

The greasers never really bothered me but they were far from being my friends. The socs were what I had to worry about. It wasn't how they tripped me in the halls or even how they threw pencils at my head during classes. It was how they cornered me after school.

During school, it was kids my age teasing me but after school, it was older kids. Some of them were probably even in high school. Everyday they would cut me off as I tried to walk home and they'd take my school bag and dump it onto the ground and take turns pushing me down while they made fun of my dressy shoes.

One day changed it all though.

"Gimme my bag!" I cried as they threw it around in their circle.

The boys just laughed and continued throwing it around until they decided it would be more fun to push me around. Every time I fell to the ground my head hurt worse and worse. I could feel tears threatening to spill from my pale blue eyes as I watched them waiting for me to get back up so they could push me back down.

"Hey!" A boy around my age shouted as he approached them. I was afraid for the boy. He wasn't any match for the half dozen ones that were surrounding me.

"Get lost grease!" A blonde boy around fifteen shouted to the boy approaching them.

"I can't get lost. I've lived here all my life and I know my way around pretty good by now," said an older boy as he walked beside the other.

Then three more boys appeared behind them. The five of them stood side by side and crossed their arms.

They looked really tough.

They all had dark hair that was slicked back with a lot of hair grease. It wasn't hard to tell they were greasers. The first boy that approached looked to be the youngest. He had short dark hair and looked to be around eleven like me. Between him and the boy to his left, I couldn't tell who was older. The boy beside him who made the comment about living here all his life looked to be the oldest of them. He was probably fifteen or so. The two boys beside him both looked around thirteen and had short, dark hair. All of the boys had grease in their hair. It was easy to tell they were greasers. They looked very intimidating.

I realized I wasn't the only one who thought this as the socs all turned and left without so much as a word.

I laid back on my elbows as I looked up at the five boys with a questioning expression. I had seen a few of the boys before but they never even so much as looked at me. I couldn't understand why they would help me out like they did.

"You alright?" The oldest boy asked me as he stepped forward and reached his hand down to help me up.

"Mhummm…" I mumbled as I accepted his hand and pulled myself up.

I felt really uncomfortable while they all looked at me expectantly like they thought I was going to start screaming at them or something. I didn't have long to be confused about their expressions before the boy who helped me up started laughing hysterically.

Now I was even more confused.

"Look at your shoes!" He choked out as he rolled on the ground laughing.

I looked down at my dressy black shoes and began to get angry.

"Well I like these shoes just fine!" I shouted as I put my hands on my hips and waited for him to calm down.

"What's your name kid?" He asked obviously amused by my outburst.

"Joey" I told him proudly as I tore my attention from my shoes.

This only made the boy on the ground laugh harder.

"….boys…name…." He could barely talk as he began rolling in the grass not caring that he was getting it all over himself.

"Nice to meet you Joey," the youngest boy said as he put his hand out for me to shake it.

I shook it and he no longer looked at me like a danger but more like an interesting object. Like a new toy even.

"I'm Ponyboy Curtis and the one on the ground is Two-Bit," the boy said shaking his head, "and this is Johnny, Steve, and Sodapop, my brother."

I looked at them all as he said their names and had to stop when I saw Sodapop. He was gorgeous!

…and that was the beginning of my long-term crush on Sodapop Curtis.

I smiled at Ponyboy and thanked him and his friends for sticking up for me. He told me it was 'nothing' and then the one called Steve told them they had to get to Ponyboy's house before a boy named Darry, who I later learned was his older brother, got angry with them. I told them all goodbye and gave Ponyboy a hug.

"If you ever need any help with those boys, you know where to find us!" Steve yelled over their heads as they walked down the street.

"No I don't!" I hollered back as I lugged my schoolbag over my shoulder.

"You will!" He yelled back with a laugh as he turned around and kept walking with everyone else. The boy was quite comical but I wasn't really thinking about him.

That night all I could think about was Sodapop Curtis. He hadn't said anything the entire time but I was hypnotized. I'd never seen a boy that good looking and I hoped I'd be seeing him again really soon.

I got my wish.


	2. Puppy love

This chapter is really short but I'm going to put up another one really soon. I'm writing it now so show me some love and leave me NICE reviews…Pwetty pwease?

Oh well, it was worth a try..On with the story!

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Joey's POV

I woke up the next day and I felt like I was on a cloud, floating about above the world. I never really liked boys before yesterday but that all changed…and it felt good.

Sodapop Curtis was beautiful. The way he walked over with those other boys and took part in helping me. He was one of my saviors and I already knew he was perfect.

He sort of glided when he walked…and you could just tell he was sensitive, funny, shy, loving, smart, loyal, gorgeous…beautiful. He had to be with a name like Sodapop. It was so original and soft it just rolled off your tongue.

I was a little girl in love. I felt like taking him flowers or cookies but I didn't want him to think I liked him. Or did I? Could I possibly have a chance with a boy like that? Why not? What did any other girl have that I didn't?

I had made up my mind about Sodapop. I was going to be his girlfriend.

I smiled at the thought of us walking hand-in-hand down the halls as all the pretty girls stared in awe. He was going to be mine and I would show him off to everyone.

I wondered when I would see him again. The boy called Steve told me that I would know how to find them sometime. When? It had only been a day and I was already missing him.

I hope Steve is right. If I don't see Sodapop soon I might explode!

I ran around my room and picked out my prettiest outfit. I found a shinny pink skirt that stopped right below my knees and my best white sweater.

I wanted to be pretty when Sodapop saw me. I would wear this outfit until I met with him and his friends again. I didn't care if I was stuck in it for days.

I put a ribbon in my hair and picked up my most expensive shoes.

'oh no' I saw smudges of mud on the sides. How could this be happening NOW?

I hurriedly ran out of my room and down the hall to the living area.

"Oh mother! My shoes are dirty and I have to clean them. I met this boy-"

"You stay away from boys! Especially ones in this neighbor hood. They're all trouble 'round these parts. Don't trust non of 'em good for nothin' sons a-" Her mother went on to call them every name I had ever heard. She was obviously drunk and looked like she was going to throw something.

My eyes began to sting and I ran into the bathroom. I cried as I pulled a towel from the closet and put it under the faucet, wetting it with warm water.

I began frantically scrubbing my shoe and set my mind to proving my mother wrong. They were good people. Especially Sodapop! He was my hero and she was calling him all those mean names.

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This will probably be the most uneventful chapter in the whole story.

This chapter was just to let you see how much Joey likes Sodapop (obviously), to give you a glimpse into her home-life, and to make sure everyone knows how young she is at this point. (Eleven just in case you don't remember.) 


	3. Friends

And she's back! What's that blur? It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's me updating with SUPERSPEED!

Random passerby-Freak-o.

Me-Hey now! That wasn't very nice!

Joey's POV

After I got my shoes cleaned I went outside and sat on my front porch. I couldn't find him in my house now could I?

'Now if I were a boy like Sodapop Curtis, where would I be?'

I thought about this for a good hour or two then I decided I better just walk around and hope to come across him at some point. I'd _'have'_ to find him eventually if I just kept walking.

I admired my surroundings as I made my way through the neighborhood. It really wasn't so bad. Sure, everything was old, beat up, shabby, and slightly unclean but everything looked beautiful today.

I felt like skipping down the sidewalk but I quickly dismissed the thought as I remembered that big girls didn't skip. That's something little girls do when they're young and stupid.

Older, sophisticated girls, like myself, simply walked down the street with grace and poise.

Of course a second after the thought, my foot fell into a crack in the walkway and I fell forward. I got up as fast as I could and quickly looked around to make sure no one was around to see me fall and I was relieved to see the road was empty.

I couldn't ever do that again. Being clumsy was for little girls and she wasn't little anymore. She was too old for skipping and falling into cracks.

I held my head high as I roamed the streets in search of my night in shining armor. I would find him sooner or later.

I just hoped it was sooner and not later.

As I walked down one street I saw a small group of older boys standing against a wire-fence. They looked around seventeen and friendly.

They all had leather jackets and faded jeans on. I hadn't ever seen these boys before but I smiled broadly at them and waved.

All I got in return was a few odd looks, one or two glares, and a few curses.

I changed my mind about them looking friendly. They didn't look as friendly as my saviors so I decided it best to turn around and leave. I hadn't had a problem with greasers yet but I knew better than to stick around when boys like that didn't want me to.

After about three hours of walking up and down empty streets I decided to go back home.

To my complete and utter surprise I saw a group of boys sitting around in a yard not far from my house.

I recognized those boys! They were my heroes.

I tried to look like I hadn't noticed them as I kept walking with my eyes set on my house.

"Hey," I heard someone yell from the group.

I turned, making sure I flipped my hair, and smiled at them.

"Oh, hello," I smiled at them and did my best to keep my eyes off of Sodapop.

"Come here," The boy named Ponyboy called me over and patted the spot next to him.

My smile grew wider as I walked over and was about to sit down before…

"Are you really going to sit in the grass wearing an outfit like that?" Two-Bit said laughing. I'd never seen a boy laugh so much.

Steve rolled his eyes at him and punched his shoulder.

"Aww leave her alone. She looks pretty," Ponyboy said smiling.

I sat down beside Ponyboy and watched Two-Bit roll on the ground for a few more minutes before his laughter finally subsided as a guy walked out of the house that owned the grass we were sitting in.

"Hey Darry!" Ponyboy shouted joyfully as he smiled at the older boy. He looked around seventeen and had a pretty muscular build.

"And who might this be?" The guy named Darry asked no one in particular as he looked at me.

"I'm Joey. It's nice to meet you Darry," I said sweetly as I put out my hand for him to shake it.

"Oh, you're the girl who lives down the street. How are you liking the East side?" He asked with a hint of amusement in his voice.

"I don't know. I haven't been here too long and I don't have any friends yet," I looked down at my shoes as I said the last part.

"Looks like you have," he paused "six friends to me." He smiled at me then went back in to the house.

"Well, now that we're all friends…I'm going to have to re-introduce you to Johnny and Sodapop here," Two-Bit looked like he was about to crack up again. "Say 'hi' Johnnyboy!"

"Hi," Johnny said shyly as he nodded toward me.

'Awww' I thought as I looked at him. He looked like a shy puppy and I wanted to give him a hug for some reason. I resisted though.

"And-" Steve started.

"I'm still Soda." He smiled at me and reached out his hand for me to shake.

I gladly accepted it and was surprised out of my wit when he pulled me forward so I fell into Two-Bits lap. To my utter horror, Two-Bit began tickling me.

I was really ticklish.

…and that was the beginning of many great friendships.


	4. It won't be the last

Cherrybombxox: Thank you! I was so happy when you used the word adorable because that's exactly what I was going for. That made me smile.

Just another anglophile: Thanks for your support. It means a lot to me to have a few people enjoy it.

Thanks for the reviews guys. 'Yall' are awesome.

Hey, this is probably going to be the last chapter where she's really young. She should be fourteen in the next chapter, then we can be done with the whole "how it began" thing.

Oh well, on with chapter four. Hope you guys like it.

Joey's POV

It had been a week since the tickling incident and I was ecstatic. Me and the 'boys', as I now called them, were getting along really well.

Sodapop really started talking to me after he pulled me onto Two-Bit's lap. We had been joking around and chasing each other all the time. Sometimes I even think he likes me. He certainly likes being with me.

I had spent a lot of time the last few days at their house watching Mickey Mouse and eating cake.

Today we were playing poker. It was the first time I'd ever played and Darry said it wouldn't hurt if I learned as long as I didn't play with real money. So we used Jelly beans.

"Okay, so the blue beans are five, the red beans are ten, the yellow beans are twenty…and the green ones are one?" It was really hard to follow.

"No, no, no...The red ones are one, the yellow ones are five, the blue ones are ten, and the green ones are twenty." Steve was holding up one of each bean to show me but I still had trouble remembering.

"Okay, I know two cards that are the same are a pair…Whats it mean when I have three cards the same too?" I kept looking from my cards to the large pile of jelly beans in the middle of the table.

"Ugh" everyone in the group grunted and folded.

I laughed and showed them my hand that consisted of a two, a four, an eight, a three, and a ten. I stretched across the table and collected my winnings as everyone started laughing.

"You catch on pretty quick kid," Two-Bit said ruffling my hair and laughing with everyone else.

"You cheated!" Ponyboy pouted as he pretended to be sad about losing a good portion of his jelly beans.

"Nu-uh" I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Yes you did!" Soda said getting up and coming across the table. "And for that-"

He took one of my jelly beans and shoved it into his mouth.

"Hey!" I shouted as he bolted out the door.

I followed and everyone else soon joined us. It was chaos everywhere. Johnny and Ponyboy were rolling in the grass trying to pin the other down. Two-Bit had Steve in a headlock and Soda and I were running around in circles as he tried to get away from me.

I leaped onto his back and he hooked onto my legs and continued running in circles.

Everyone was laughing and having a good time until a car pulled up in front of the house. A boy around Darrys age stepped out of the drivers side and a girl around twelve climbed out of the other.

The boy was muscular, but not as strong looking as Darry. The girl, however, was a bit taller than me. Slim with blonde, wavy hair that went half way down her back. I instantly recognized her as a girl in my school. She was a soc. A popular one too. I couldn't imagine what they were doing there.

A moment after she closed the car door, Soda dropped me, rather roughly, onto the ground and I fell onto the grass. I sat up and was horrified when I saw Soda put his arm around the girl and kiss her…on the lips!

I felt horrible. I wanted to run home and cry my eyes out but I couldn't. Not while everyone was watching.

Everyone was crowded around me and looking at the couple. Two-Bit glanced down at me and gave me an odd look before he helped me up and laid his hand on my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.

Soda led the girl over to us. Everyone began talking again as if nothing happened. She obviously knew the guys but not me. Of course I knew her name but I was sure she didn't know mine. Soda didn't even introduce us! I was hurt and I couldn't even show it.

The only things I knew about her was that her name was Anna and that I now hated her.

I noticed Two-Bit's hand was still on my shoulder as he joked with Steve about the girl's older brother's sweater. It definitely struck me as odd. It was rather comforting though. It made me feel like I wasn't as alone as I felt right now and he probably did it on purpose.

I looked up at him and he gave me a look of sympathy as he gave my shoulder another squeeze. Oh yeah. He definitely knew something.

I started to walk away.

"Hey, where you going?" Steve yelled over the group as I began my journey home.

"I promised mom I wouldn't be gone long." I lied as turned around to hid my tears.

The walk home seemed longer than it usually did. I hugged myself and let my tears fall freely as I trudged on.

That was the first time Sodapop Curtis broke my heart…and it wouldn't be the last.

The next time you see Joey, she's going to be fourteen…Oh yeah..I already told you that.

Well, bye then.


	5. Fourteen

Cherrybombxox: A cookie for me? Heck yes! Cookies are my favorite food next to toast and ice cream. (Ha ha. Don't ask.) Thanks so much for your support. I'll update as frequently as I possibly can.

angeloves1: Don't worry. I'm not killing anyone off…Unless I get bored one day and kill her drunken mom or something. But I probably won't do that either. Thanks for the reviews. Keep 'em comin'. I love hearing what you guys have to say.

Rugrats101: In the last chapter Joey was eleven. This chapter is going to be her fourteenth birthday. I skip around a bit. Sorry. It's kind of confusing. Thanks for the review. I really appreciate it.

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Joey's POV

Today is my fourteenth birthday.

I found in the last three years that Sodapop Curtis attracts a lot of girls. By now, I was madly in love with him. Before I didn't even know it was possible to love him anymore but, sadly, I found out it was.

Every few weeks Sodapop would have another girlfriend and when he didn't have a girlfriend, he was swarmed with pretty girls around his age. 

Maybe that was the problem. What would a sixteen year old boy want with a thirteen year old girl? If I was old enough to be his best friend, why wasn't I old enough to be his girlfriend? Nothing seemed to make sense anymore.

But today I'll be fourteen and then there will only be a two year difference. That's not much at all.

The boys really grew up from the time I met them. Two-Bit was almost eighteen and Darry was twenty. They were all grown men except for Pony and maybe Johnny. Even Steve was sixteen now along with Soda. Everyone was growing up so fast and I hoped I was too.

My hopes were crushed when I looked into my bedroom mirror and saw that I didn't look any different than I had yesterday. I felt older somehow, but I sure didn't look it.

I looked at my reflection and tilted my head as if to see something that wasn't really there. I wanted to believe that I looked older but I soon found that no angle could cure youth. No matter how I looked at myself or what I wore, I was a child.

I continued to stare blankly at the mirror. I wasn't the biggest girl on the block. I was 5'3 and way too skinny. I had frizzy, wavy brown hair that went a bit below my shoulders and hardly any curves on my body. I could see why Soda preferred the kind of girls that hung all over him. You could tell by the way they acted that I was more mature than they were but they were older, prettier, curvier, and, for lack of a better term, more girly.

These past three years had, more or less, turned me into a boy. I began wearing faded blue jeans all the time and baseball caps. It's not like I could fit into my old, expensive skirts anymore anyway.

I hated my birthdays now. The only thing I hoped for every birthday since I met the 'boys' was that Soda would realize I wasn't a little girl. I always set myself up for disappointment. Of course Soda wouldn't come to realize that I wasn't a little girl if I truly didn't believe it myself.

What's the difference between fourteen and sixteen anyway? I suppose I'm going to have to wait two years to figure it out. But by then I'm probably going to be thinking 'What's the difference between sixteen and eighteen?'

My birthdays since we moved were spent mostly at home.

Mom usually went to work early in the morning until around six in the evening and then she'd come home and get drunk. But not on my birthday!

I hated my mom when she was drunk and she knew it so as a present, she wouldn't drink all day. She'd wake up really early, make a big breakfast for me, tell me she loved me, and then she'd go to work. It wasn't much but it was my favorite part about my birthday. I know she wasn't the best mother in the world, but she loved me, even if it was only for a day.

The first half of my birthday would be spent piled in my house with a bunch of relatives on my late fathers side.

My Aunt Mona, would give me flowers, chocolates, an expensive dress, and some money. Her brother, my Uncle Joseph, would always try to out-do her and give me something better. This year he gave me the most beautiful bracelet I had ever seen and matching earrings. I loved my uncle.

A few other random relatives would stop by with presents and be on their way as quick as possible and some of them would even send presents with Aunt Mona and Joseph. I had a feeling most of my family didn't like our house. No one ever visited. Only on holidays or my birthday. I suppose that was always why my mother never took the day off for my birthday. She couldn't bear to be seen in this house with all my father's family. They would probably lecture her and she was too old to be told how to live. Or at least that's what she said.

After everyone stopped leaving presents and telling me how much they loved me, I ran over to the Curtis's house, where I know everyone was piled into the living room waiting for me.

I burst into the door, as everyone did, and started laughing hysterically at the sight I was greeted with.

Everyone in the room was laughing except for Steve, who was on the floor with a look of horror on his face, and Darry, who's face was covered in ice cream.

Even Dallas Winston was laughing. I had met Dally about a month ago and I was terrified of him. He was really tall and looked like he could take anyone. Of course he wasn't as strong looking as Darry but he certainly looked meaner. He had golden hair, like Sodas, but you could tell Dally never combed his. He also didn't use hair grease. I suppose he thought it made him look…greasy. Dallas Winston was no grease. He was a hood.

Darry looked like he was going to explode and I assumed Steve had thrown the ice cream at him. He looked like he'd seen a ghost.

Darry was making his way over to Steve so I decided to make my presence known.

"Hello!" I shouted, waving my arms in the air to get attention.

"But Joey, whatever ARE you doing here today?" Two-Bit joked looking at me like I was an unexpected visitor.

"You tell me!" I said running behind him and taking his blade from his back pocket. Two-Bit loved his blade so I knew he'd chase me down trying to get it.

"Hey!" He chased after me as I ran around in circles, making sure to bump into Darry a few times to take his mind off of Steve. It worded, rather spectacularly, as he grabbed me by the shoulders, making my feet lift from the floor, and walked me into the kitchen. Everyone followed with chuckles.

"Happy birthday to you," Everyone began singing the birthday song as Steve lit the fourteen candles on the large chocolate cake.

"Happy birthday Joey" Soda whispered into my ear and kissed me on the cheek. When he got close like that I could barely stang. I felt like melting and I must have gotten a dreamy expression on my face because Two-Bit looked like he was going to burst out laughing. Of course Two-Bit knew. He'd known since the first day we met that I was in love with Sodapop. The day after I had met Anna, Sodapops then girlfriend, Two-Bit came to my house and explained to me that Anna was just a random girlfriend and I was more important. Two-Bit was a real pal.

I got a big goofy grin on my face as I blew out my candles. I wished for the same thing I wished for every year. I wished for Sodapop.

"Cake time!" Soda was jumping out in front of everyone to get some of the cake.

"Hey! It's my birthday!" I pouted as I pushed him out of the way. I got my cake first and went in the living room to sit down on the couch. Dally was still in the room. I hated being alone with him.

"So you're fourteen today huh?" He watched me as I shuffled the ice cream around my plate.

"Yeah" I said quietly as I glanced up at him.

"You look older." He commented, getting up and walking into the kitchen.

I couldn't help but smile as I watched him disappear.

An hour or two later we were all piled back up in the living room. Dally had left a few minutes earlier but I was still smiling from what he had said. That was the best present I'd gotten all day. Of course that changed when I sat on the couch waiting for Darry so I could open my present.

He walked into the room and sat in his chair as everyone looked at me to open my gift.

It was a small box about the size of my hand. I was excited and could barely wait to get it opened.

When I pulled the lid off my smile grew even wider and my jaw fell open.

There in the box laid a little silver locket. I pulled it out of the box by its delicate chain and admired it.

"Awww…You guys didn't have to do this." I looked from the locket to all the boys.

"We all chipped in. We knew you'd like it. Pony picked it out," Steve explained to me as he smiled at the expression on my face.

"Yeah, but it was Johnny who thought up the engraving" Pony told me as he nodded toward Johnny.

I opened the locket and saw a picture of me and all seven of the guys.

On the other side of the locket was an engraving that read-

"Friends until the end" Simple, yet beautiful.

"Johnny!" I squealed as I reached over Ponyboy, who was sitting beside me, to give Johnny a big hug. Johnny of course blushed and muttered a 'you're welcome'

Everyone laughed at this and the night went on to be great for the next hour or so.

Even though we did things like this for everyone in the groups birthdays, I felt special tonight. I felt like a princess. That is until Soda got up.

"Where you goin' Soda?" Two-Bit asked confused as Soda grabbed his jacket and began heading for the door.

"I've got to go. I told Maria I'd come over an hour ago." He mumbled as he turned to leave.

"It's the kid's birthday!" Darry shouted as he stood up with Two-Bit. I silently hoped that Darry didn't know I loved Soda too.

"It's been hours already and Maria said she needed to see me tonight…You're okay with that aren't you, Joey?" Everyone looked at me expectantly.

I couldn't very well tell him to stay so I hesitantly nodded my head and did my best to smile at him.

"Thank you. You'll always be me favorite girl" he ruffled my hair and made his way out the door.

If I'm you're favorite girl, why are you choosing her over me?


	6. Same old story

DallyxSodaJDLuvinHoods: Thank you. I thought the name was cute also. I think it suits a teenager too so I figured it would fit nicely. You'll just have to wait and see how everything will turn out. wink...Nobody saw that!

lady rose 05: Thanks for the review. I update pretty often so I won't keep anyone waiting too long.

Rugrats101: I know. Johnny is adorable. I'm going to have to write one of these things about him one day. I want to write one about Dally too. Soon.

Dess: I didn't even know they were disabled. Thank you for telling me and leaving a review. I really appreciate it.

Thanks for the reviews guys. It really makes me happy!

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Joey's POV

After Soda left, we all went back to joking around and watching TV. Darry and Two-Bit seemed a little perturbed about something, but I didn't think much of it. Darry always had his mind somewhere else and Two-Bit was joking like usual, so I didn't see any reason to fuss over it.

I couldn't stop thinking about Sodapop. I was used to him ditching me for girls but never on my birthday. It hurt a lot more than I was willing to show. It seemed that was all Soda could ever do to me.

When you love something for so long, not getting any returned feelings, you begin to hate it. I could never hate Sodapop but I hated the feelings he gave me. I couldn't help that I loved him. I wish I didn't but I did and it was eating me alive.

Day after day I fell in love with him a little more. It was really hard being the girl walking down the street next to Sodapop. Every time he smiled at a passing girl it broke my heart a little more. I never walked with Soda alone anymore. I just couldn't handle it.

After the party was finally over I walked over to my house and sat on the steps.

I kept replaying the night over and over again. From Soda whispering in my ear to Dally telling me I looked older to the boy I love leaving me for some other girl.

I hated Soda at times like these. Times when he made me feel like I wasn't good enough. Times when he made me feel like a child. Times when he made me want to cry.

Soda never hurt me on purpose. That was part of why I was in love with him. But the more he hurt me, the more I hated him and loved him at the same time.

Who knew a boy like Sodapop Curtis could hurt someone so badly. I was mind-blowing that anyone on the planet could cry because of Sodapop Curtis.

He made me cry as much as he made me smile, which come to think of it, wasn't that often anymore.

I cried over Sodapop all the time these days. I know I should be tough about things like this but I'm not. I'm fourteen years old. I shouldn't have to deal with love and suffering but I do. All for Soda.

I sat in the darkness of my porch steps for hours that night and I cried silently the whole time.

Eventually Sodapop came walking down the street and spotted me. I hurriedly whipped my eyes and tried to smile at him.

He looked a bit down about something and I couldn't help but think that it was about time. It was kind of comforting that I wasn't the only one suffering even if it was only for awhile.

"So how was Marcia?" I didn't like the awkward feeling that had settled over us.

"Maria" He corrected as he sat back on the steps and stared up at the sky.

I waited for him to speak before I opened my mouth again.

"She broke up with me. She said I was…I think she said 'distant and childish'" He looked at me and shrugged.

"I'm sorry" I didn't really know what to say.

"Don't worry about it. She was all wrong for me anyway." He paused looking at me "I'll find the right girl eventually." He went back to staring at the sky.

We sat like that for a few minutes before he tore his eyes away from the stars and stood up.

"You know. You're a really good friend," He smiled at me and hugged his jacket to himself. "I'm glad I have you." Then he turned around and left.

I watched as he walked away. I felt like dying.

He said friend. That's all I was ever going to be and it was time I realized it.

I got up, walked inside to my room and did something that was turning into a bad habit of mine. I cried myself to sleep.

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Sorry this chapter was so short. I'm going to start writing another one right after this is posted but I don't know if it'll be up today or tomorrow. I promise you'll have it soon and I'll make it longer than this one. Thanks again for the reviews. They really keep me going.


	7. Never

Hey! Two chapters in one day! How awesome is that?

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For the next few months, I grew colder and colder. Of course Sodapop didn't notice. He was too busy with his flavor of the week.

I've been trying to forget about my feelings for him but it seems the more I try and get comfortable with only being friends, the worse I feel and the meaner I get.

It had been eight months since my birthday. Ponyboy was now fourteen with me, Two-Bit was eighteen, Darry was twenty, Dally and Steve were seventeen, and Johnny and Soda were sixteen but Soda would be turning seventeen soon.

Thinking about Soda's birthday made me remember mine. If I had any sense I would walk out of it halfway through or not even show up at all.

Everyone tells me how Sodapop Curtis can understand anyone better than they can understand themselves. This was the biggest load of crap I'd ever heard.

If he could understand me he'd know I loved him and he could put me out of my misery. But no. Soda will never figure it out and I'm not dumb enough to tell him.

I don't know why I never made any girl-friends. I'm constantly surrounded by boys so I couldn't very well talk to any of them about these things.

Two-Bit knew and I had a strange suspicion Darry did too, but I would be embarrassed to talk to any of them about it. I'm surrounded by people I love and I've never felt more alone.

Tonight there was a big party at Bucks. Darry wouldn't let Pony go so he and Johnny stayed at his house playing cards and watching TV. Steve, Soda, and Two-Bit had already left and I intended to follow them when I thought I could safely get away.

Don't get me wrong, Darrys not my father and he doesn't control me but I knew if I mentioned going to the party he would forbid it so I told him I was going home and went to get ready.

I walked down the hall into my room and began searching for something to wear. There was no way I was going to a party like Bucks wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

I wondered into my mom's empty bedroom and began searching through some of her things. The woman was a drunk but she sure knew how to dress.

I finally found a light blue skirt that went down to my mid-thigh and a white long sleeve shirt. I made my way back into my room and rummaged through the drawers until I found what I needed.

I took off my silver locket I had gotten from my birthday and replaced it with a little black collar with a heart hanging from it. I pulled a little white box from my dresser and opened it to get my bracelet Uncle Joseph gave me and the matching earrings.

I put on my blue low tops and went into the bathroom to fix my hair. I plugged in the curling iron and stared at my reflection.

'What am I doing?' I shock my head as I pulled out my moms case of makeup. I didn't use a lot. I was afraid it wouldn't come off or I'd look like a clown. I wasn't really experienced in the ways of makeup but I knew how to make it look good from seeing my mom put it on. After the curling iron was hot enough I curled my hair in big spiral curls and put a white headband on. I put on a very shinny lip gloss and walked into my room to look at myself in the full length mirror.

I stared oddly at my reflection. I looked…It was hard to tell. The little blue skirt showed my legs and the white long-sleeved shirt was a bit tight but that was the way it was supposed to be I guess. This is what I'm supposed to look like.

I turned and walked out of my room, out of my house, out of my shell, out of my mind.

It wasn't too long a walk but I was a bit worried to be walking alone. I never walked alone. Not anywhere. It just wasn't something a person did in this part of town…or any part of this town for that matter.

I was lucky to make it to Bucks without a problem. Hopefully I could catch a ride with Two-Bit or something, though he would probably be too drunk to drive.

I knocked on the door and a tall guy with a flannel shirt opened it.

"Hellooooo! Join the party!" Oh yeah. This guy was wasted. I pushed past him and wandered about the house. The living room was packed so I decided to go into the kitchen and see who was in there. I immediately saw Two-Bit conversing with a group of people I didn't know. Some were boys, some were girls. Two-Bit was so drunk I didn't know if he could guess the difference.

"Joey!" He waved to me as he took a long drink from his beer.

"Hey," I looked around the group of people. The guys were looking me up and down and the girls had their noses up.

'So the outfit was a good idea'…

I reached into the fridge behind a blonde girl making out with the guy who answered the door and grabbed a beer. I'd never drunk before but it really seemed like the time to start.

"I don't believe Darry let you come here…" He paused finally looking at my clothes and hair, "especially looking like that"

He smiled at me. "You look hot" He said stumbling into the pretty blonde beside him. The blonde bit her lip and literally jumped him. There was no way I was watching this so I grabbed another beer, as I had finished the first one, and made my way into the next room.

The room had a pool table in it and it was being put to good use as I saw two people making out on top of it. I laughed a little and made my way back into the kitchen. I hurriedly chugged my beer and got another one. This went on for about an hour before I got tired of standing up. I pulled another beer out of the fridge and went into the living room that was still packed.

I saw an open seat on the couch and took it before someone else did. I had to admit, I had one hell of a buzz.

"Joey," The guy beside me sounded confused. I looked over to him and was surprised to see Dally.

"Oh! Hey Dal!" I couldn't help but slur my words a bit. He raised his eyebrows at me.

"Are you drunk Joey?" He looked amused.

"Now why would you say that?" I moved so I was closer to him.

"How many of those have you had?" He nodded toward my half full beer bottle.

"A fair few" I laughed. I don't know why. I really couldn't help it.

"Give me the bottle Joey" He looked bored and amused. I didn't even know that look was possible but it only made me laugh harder.

He reached over me to try and get the bottle and I don't know why but…I kissed him.

I pushed forward and kissed him so hard he fell back flat on the couch with me on top of him.

"Woah! Slow down there, tiger" He looked like he was going to laugh. Oh no. Here comes the depression.

I got off of Dally and leaned back onto the couch.

"Well what do YOU think is wrong with me now?" I crossed my arms and looked at the ceiling.

"What do you mean?" He sat up and looked at me confused. I snorted.

"Whats wrong with me? I've seen the kind of girls you get with and I don't see what's wrong with me. Since when are you picky?" I didn't slur as much as I said this. I was too angry.

"One, you're drunk. Two, I have a feeling I'm not the guy you had in mind." He had me there.

"How would you know?" I really wasn't in the mood for this.

"You can't even talk right!" He looked at me like I'd grown another head.

"I meant how do you know you're not the guy I want?" I did my best to look calm.

He looked to his right and nodded. I followed his eyes to see Sodapop talking to some pretty red-head with a mini-skirt. He was facing our direction but he wasn't looking at us. He was looking at HER. That whore.

I got angry and stood up to go yell at him but with my bad timing, I got up just as a guy was passing and he spilt his beer all over my shirt.

"Ugh!" I let out a frustrated yelp as I almost lost my footing. The guy reached out and held me up so I wouldn't hit the floor.

"Thanks" I said sarcastically and pulled his hands off my shoulder. The guy mumbled a sorry and went on his way.

I looked down at my shirt and sighed. Could this night get any worse?

I remembered the thin, white undershirt I had on and took the long-sleeved one off. The tank top was really thin and showed a bit of my stomach but I didn't care. I was definitely drunk and I looked like any other whore in the place so I just sat back down. I glanced back over to Soda and his eyes met mine for a moment and I could have sworn I saw a look or confusion on his face before he went back to chatting up the redhead.

"Come on." Dally sighed and pulled me off of the couch and out the front door.

I was immediately hit with an icy cold chill as the cold air touched my skin. Dally saw that I was cold and put his brown leather jacket around me. We walked for about ten minutes in silence before Dally spoke.

"Why are you dressed like that anyway?" He nodded toward me.

"I wanted to look like a girl." I couldn't think of anything better to say.

"You ARE a girl" He was confused.

"Not according to Sodapop Curtis." I rolled my eyes "He thinks I'm a guy"

Dally got a knowing expression on his face.

"Look, just because the guy doesn't notice you like that, doesn't mean you should change yourself."

Oh glory! I was getting advice from Dallas Winston.

"You see all the girls he goes out with. Short skirts, nice bodies, makeup…" I looked down at my outfit and tried to decide if I liked it or not.

"Maybe he goes out with those kind of girls because they throw themselves at him." He paused as if he was searching for what to say "With girls like that, you don't have to go through the whole 'Does she like me' process. It makes things easier."

"So I should be easier?" I looked up at him.

"No. You're not like them and you should be proud of that. You're not bad looking and you're a nice girl. Look, if Soda's going to like you, he'll like you. No number like that, no matter how nice you look in it, is going to change that" I didn't want to hear this right now.

"I guess he'll never like me then…" I looked down at my feet as I kicked a rock in front of me.

"Do you think I'm a kid?" I asked after awhile.

"No." He looked in front of him as he walked.

I smiled at him and we kept walking.

"I love him" I don't know why I said that. Maybe it was because I was drunk but I think it was that I just needed someone to talk about it.

"Like real love or crush love?" He seemed to be thinking hard about something.

"Real love" I said it slowly and sadly. "I know Sodapop Curtis enough to know he'll never love me."

Dally looked at me with sympathy. We finally made it to my house and I gave him his jacket back.

"Hang in there kid." He ruffled my hair affectionately and watched me go inside before leaving.

I crawled into my bed and slept until the next afternoon.


	8. When you assume

Who really cares about pennames anyway: You'll find out why Soda didn't go to talk to her soon enough. Thank you so much for the reviews and your question will be answered very soon. Wink!

lady rose 05: I know! I made Dally a softy…Kinda. Ha ha. Thank you for all the reviews you've left me. It really makes me happy. You're officially on my awesome list.

Sodapop's#1gurl: Sodapop didn't go talk to her because….Well I can't tell you yet now can I? You're just going to have to wait and see. Wink! You'll find out soon. I promise! Thanks for the review by the way. I love knowing some people actually enjoy it.

angeloves1: Thank you so much for all of your support! It really means a lot to me. I love frequent reviewers!

DallyxSodaJDLuvinHoods: Thank you for all your reviews too! I love you guys who review a lot. It makes me happy!

Thank you all again. Supporters rock! All your questions will be answered shortly.

I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. Tell me what you think!

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I woke up at four o'clock in the afternoon the next day with what I assumed was my first hangover.

Everything from Buck's party was a bit of a blur but I remembered the 'finer' parts.

I remember dressing like a slut, getting drunk, seeing people practically having sex on pool tables and on kitchen counters…I cringed when I remembered Two-Bit was one of the people.

The rest was almost impossible to remember but I'm fairly certain I got my first kiss from practically jumping Dallas Winston and I know I saw Soda talking to some red-head.

I tried hard to remember how I got home but then I remembered that Dally walked me.

I mumbled a few curses when I remembered how I'd told Dally about my undying love for Sodapop Curtis.

I crawled out of bed and made my way toward the bathroom where I spent the next hour emptying my stomach contents and taking a shower.

I put my hair into a ponytail and slipped into a pair of faded jeans and a blue t-shirt. I stuffed my feet back into my blue lowtops and made my way out the door.

I noticed my mom's bedroom door was opened but didn't think much of it. She was probably still at work.

The walk to the Curtis's house seemed like it took forever. Even at seven o'clock the sun was stinging my eyes and making my head hurt. Probably compliments form last night.

I opened the door and was surprised when I saw no one was in the living room. I supposed everyone was at the dingo or the movies or something.

I heard voices from the kitchen and recognized them as Darry and Soda's.

I couldn't hear what they were saying so I inched closer to the doorway.

"That's rough kid,", came Darry's voice.

"I was really going to tell her Darry. I saw her walk in and after awhile I figured if I didn't tell her I loved her soon, some other bum would get to her. When I finally found her again, I saw THEM going at it on the couch. Next thing I know, they're leaving together." Soda sounded like he was going to either cry or fall asleep. I didn't care. I was glad some stupid girl finally broke Soda's heart like he broke mine. He deserved this.

"Maybe it just wasn't meant to be" I peeked in to see Darry patting Soda on the back. Soda started to stand up so I hurriedly hid back behind the wall.

"Yeah…" He sniffed rather loudly and let out a defeated sort of laugh. "I met a girl afterwards anyway. She said a boy like me should never be that sad. She's real nice." I crept out the front door as Darry and Soda came into the living room.

I walked down the front steps and was cut off by Steve.

"Hey Steve," I tried to keep my voice down so Soda and Darry wouldn't hear me and find out I was eavesdropping.

"Oh hey, did you talk to Soda last night?" That was an odd question.

"No…why?" I spoke slowly, dreading the answer.

"He said he had something important to tell you."

Steve's words hit me like a sack of bricks.

I could already feel the tears coming as I remembered Darry and Soda's conversation.

'THEM going at it on the couch'

I remembered Dally.

"Oh my god..." I was definitely going to cry soon.

Steve looked like he didn't know what to do. Of course he was confused. I certainly wasn't though. I screwed up and I might spend the rest of my life paying for it.

I heard Darry, "What's the name of that girl you met last night anyway?"

He and Soda were coming outside. I shoved out past Steve and through the neighbor's yard before either of them saw me. The only thing I heard was Soda's voice as I jumped a fence and took the long way back to my house.

"Sandy"

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Oh no! Now he's gone and met Sandy! All because he saw Joey and Dally at Buck's party! Ugh!

What's going to happen next? We'll find out soon!

(Yeah I know! I'm cheesy!)


	9. Rain

mIsS sHoWjUmPeR: Thank you. That was so sweet! I'll update as soon as I can. Thanks for your support.

kaligirl05:Oh I know. I just didn't want anyone to get confused. I agree! It is a nice name. Yeah, I update a lot because I have no life. It's all good though. Thanks for the reviews.

WoPo12: I know! Boys are nothing but trouble! Thanks for the review. Now let's see what Sandy is going to do to the plot! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha!

Sodapop's#1gurl: Yeah. I suppose it was a rather mean way of me to end the chapter…I got a kick out of it though. (Smiles evilly) "Mwa ha ha ha ha!" 

Rugrats101:Don't worry! All questions will be answered in due time. Be patient and leave me reviews! Mwa ha ha ha ha!

UrnotSethCohen: I know! I want to see them together too but let's just see what kind of crap Sandy can cause! Wink-Wink! Mwa Ha ha. I crack myself up.

DallyxSodaJDLuvinHoods: I know! Will they ever get together? You'll just have to wait and see! Mwa-ha ha ha ha! (I do that a lot!) Thanks for the review! I love hearing from you!

angeloves1: Why thank you (bows). I love hearing from you (as always). I'm glad you liked it. I didn't really know if it was a yay or nay. Thanks for your support. Mwa ha ha ha ha ha.

Who really cares about pennames anyway: Well that part of you is no longer inquisitive now is it? Mwa ha ha ha ha ha! (Sorry bout the evil laugh. I gave everyone else one and I didn't want you to feel left out!)

You guys are so awesome. I love hearing from you. 

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Joey's POV

You'd think after all these years of crying over Sodapop Curtis would make me run out of tears by now, but no siree! Yet again I was crying and he was oblivious.

I was afraid to look back. I hoped Steve would have enough sense to forget about seeing me and act like I was never there. I couldn't deal with Soda seeing me like this and I didn't know if I would ever be able to look at him again without crying.

I couldn't help but wonder how long Soda had loved me. He had made it sound like it had been awhile but I didn't believe that. Soda just stopped dating a girl two weeks ago.

I don't know why I bothered thinking about it. It was too late now. I screwed everything up and I already knew I'd be paying for it.

As if on cue it started raining and not just a little. It was pouring. I seriously doubted this day could get any worse as the freezing rain soaked through my clothes. I just kept running. If I stopped now I knew that I'd break down, so I sped up and passed my house.

The only sounds to be heard were the rain bouncing off the gravel and my feet pounding on the sidewalk. I tried to think of something else. 

I remembered my dad when I was a little girl. I thought of how he'd tuck me into bed at night and read me a story. I remembered how my mother would stand in the doorway with an expression that only meant love. We were a family…But now we were nothing.

I thought of my friends.

My friends loved me. I loved them all. Two-Bit, Darry, Dally, Steve, Pony, Johnny…I wouldn't think of Soda. I can't think of Soda. I can't be around Soda…not after all this. If I kept thinking about him, I'd lose it.

I was running so fast I didn't see a branch on the sidewalk and I fell to my knees. I felt like screaming.

'Soda loved me'. 'He'll never feel for me again'. 'He's going to love her'. 'It'll always be someone else'. 'It'll never be me'.

Thoughts poured into my head as quick as the rain. I lost it.

I lost Soda.

After awhile I pushed myself off the ground and started walking back in the direction of my house. Thinking about these things wouldn't do me any good. I was through with hurting myself. If I don't think about the pain, it doesn't exist.

It can't exist.

I pushed open the door and scanned the living room through tear-stained eyes. I walked through the hall and into my mother's room. No sign of her.

I sighed and sat down on her bed. It wasn't the first time she disappeared but I wanted her home for a reason I didn't really understand. I knew she would probably be drunk when she returned, but I didn't care. I needed someone with me.

I lie down on the blue cover and dozed off.

I awoke to the sound of the telephone ringing. I glanced out the window and saw that it was dark.

I grumbled slightly and stretched. Mom still wasn't home so maybe she was calling.

"Yeah right…"

I walked over to the phone and picked it up.

"Yeah?" I really didn't feel like talking right now. The day's events had worn me out and I wanted nothing more than to go back into a deep, dreamless sleep.

"Joey Jacobs?" I didn't recognize the voice and they obviously didn't know mine.

"Yes…" Something wasn't right.

"Um…This is the Tulsa Hospital, your mother is here…and uh…you...uh…You just need to get down here" The man on the line sounded like they were choosing their words carefully.

"What? Why? What's wrong?" My mind was racing.

"Um…I'm not authorized to say. Just get down here please"

"Wait-Wait! Is she going to be alright?" He had already hung up.

I dropped the phone and ran outside. It was still raining and it was entirely too late to be walking alone anywhere. I didn't care. I sped down the street to the Curtis's house. Darry's truck wasn't in the driveway so I kept going.

A rational thought didn't cross my mind. I couldn't think of anything. All I knew as I ran down the dark road leading to the main ones, was that I had to keep going.

I finally made it to the building and threw the doors open. I got a few odd stares as I ran to the desk. Probably because I was soaked and out of breath.

"I'm Joey Jacobs-" The person at the desk silenced me and pointed to a set of double-doors. I ran to them and pushed my way through.

I immediately saw Uncle Joseph in the hallway. He was sitting in a chair in the hallway with his head down.

"Oh no.." I whispered as he looked up at me and managed a sad smile. I already knew what he was going to say.

"No…" I shook my head rapidly and he slowly nodded.

"No, no, no…" I couldn't help repeating myself as I flung into Uncle Joseph's arms. He didn't have to say anything. I knew by the way he was looking at me that she was gone.

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This chapter was pretty short. Sorry guys, but I though it would be best to end it there. I'll get the next chapter up as soon as possible. Sorry for the wait.


	10. Nobody cares

Hey guys. I figured since I skipped like three days before I updated last time I should put out another chapter today. Why? Because I'm cool like that. Ha ha.

Dess: Thank you for the review. All the questions will be answered in this…sad excuse for a chapter. I don't think I like it much but I did my best. I hope you like it.

Angeloves1: Oh my gosh! You're like my favorite reviewer ever! Thank you SO much. I hope you like this chapter. I don't know if I like it or not but I did my best.

To everyone: I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter either. I hope it doesn't seem rushed…Let me know what you guys think. If you like it, I like it.

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Joey's POV

It was official. Mom died. She was admitted to the Tulsa Hospital yesterday after collapsing at work and had passed away half an hour before I had arrived there. The doctors had said it was a tumor. I didn't know how I felt about that. Maybe it was the doctors fault for not noticing it before, or maybe it was mom's fault for not looking into it earlier. If anyone was guilty in this, it was me.

They had been trying to get a hold of me since she had gotten there and I was too busy throwing a fit over something I should be used to by now to care.

If I wouldn't have been so selfish, I would have noticed something was wrong and I could have seen her before she…died.

It was a hard concept to grasp. I wasn't thinking of her coming home drunk. I wasn't thinking of her hating my friends. I wasn't thinking of her ignoring me. I was thinking of my birthdays. I was thinking of those nights when she watched dad tuck me in at night all those years ago.

I couldn't even cry. I wanted to but I couldn't. I tried thinking of Soda, dad, and mom but all I could do was stare off in the distance and think about how it was only a matter of time before I didn't have anything. I was too overwhelmed to cry.

When everything piles on top of you at once, you go numb. It's like insomnia. You're never asleep and you're never really awake. You simply exist. I couldn't laugh, cry, think rationally, or care that everyone around me was worried sick.

It had been three days since Laura Jacobs had passed away. Relatives I've never met and all the boys had come over and told me how we were all going to get through this and how everything would be okay. How would they know? They didn't know how I felt. Okay…Darry, Soda, and Pony might know a bit of what I'm feeling but they can't understand what its like to be torn between loving and hating their mother at the same time. The Curtis's parents were great to them. There weren't any thoughts of drunken nights and cold greetings when their parents passed. My confusion only made it hurt worse.

I couldn't decide if I was mad at her or sad that she was gone. She was horrible to me for the past few years and I hated her for it. But for the first eleven years of my life, she was my best friend. She played with me in the park and let me help her in the garden. She loved me.

The worse feeling in the world is sadness and confusion bundled into one road that led to a dead end. I wish I could cry.

At least I didn't have to leave. I was scared to death I would have to go live with Uncle Joseph or some other relative in New York or some place even further away from my friends.

Joseph told me how an older cousin of mine, who I had never met, owned a restaurant on the East Side and she was going to come and live with me so I wouldn't have to leave.

Her name was Melissa. All I knew was that she was thirty, she always wanted a child and she would probably have to redecorate the house to her liking but all I cared about was staying in the house. I didn't care how it looked. The wallpaper was rolling off the walls and the floors were stained with paint and god knows what else.

Three days after my mother passed away and I'm thinking about paint on the floor. Crying would make it a little better if only I could will the tears to spill. I had cried enough in the last few years to know that it makes you feel better, if only a little. I couldn't feel anything.

I was sitting outside my overcrowded house in the pouring rain. The dozen relatives in my living room probably didn't even see me leave. They were too busy trying to think of ways to make me feel better so they could sleep at night. I didn't care if they felt guilty. I just needed to feel something. Anything, even if it was just the cold rain bouncing off my skin.

I sat in the grass in the middle of the yard with my legs crossed underneath me. It wasn't dark yet but it was getting close. The sky was a dark shade of blue and I had every intention of watching it until it went black.

The rain pouring into my face made me feel like I was crying. I knew it wasn't real but it was of some relief. Maybe if I stayed there longer I would feel better.

I looked in front of me and saw Soda standing there looking at me.

He had his hands shoved in his jean's pockets and he looked worried.

'Not now…' I thought as I looked back up to the sky.

I felt him brush my shoulder as he sat beside me in the rain.

"What are you doing Joey?" He sounded tired.

"Getting away" I didn't look at him. I was afraid to.

I silently prayed that Steve hadn't told him that I'd been listening to him and Darry talking.

"From what" He was talking so softly I could barely hear him over the pounding rain.

"Relatives. They say they care about me but why should I believe them? They weren't here when I was growing up." Even though I couldn't talk to Soda about the more important problems I always had, but I could talk to him about this.

"and your mom was…?" Soda was entirely too good at understanding people. I just wasn't used to him being able to understand me. Soda always hated my mother for the way she treated me and I couldn't blame him for that…I could get mad about it though.

"Yes" I was getting angrier as my voice rose slightly. "They weren't there when I needed someone. They weren't there when I learned to ride a bike. They weren't there when I broke my arm. They weren't there when I was in trouble. They weren't there when I got my first 'F'. They weren't there when I turned twelve, thirteen, or fourteen! She was the only person who was!" My voice got louder as I stood up and shouted at Soda.

"I was" he looked hurt.

My voice softened drastically and I was almost whispering. "No, you weren't Soda," I turned and walked up the steps.

"No, you weren't."

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Aww! How sad!


	11. They're both crazy

Lady rose 05: I know. How sad! Thanks for your support and for the review.

UrnotSethCohen: Thank you for the review. I know! I'd like to see them together too! Oh well, We'll all just have to wait and see! Mwa ha ha ha ha ah! Thanks for the review!

kaligirl05: I know! But he wasn't exactly all nice to her now was he! Remember the birthday party? I do! Mean, mean Soda. He deserved it! Thanks for the review!

WoPo12: You didn't think I'd forgotten about Sandy did you? Mwa ha ha ha ha! Wait and see. She will be in this chapter but I don't think she'll be in it much…Just enough to let you know her roll in the story now. WINK! Thanks for the review.

st.elmo-lover: I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make anyone cry! Its okay! Don't worry! If it will make you feel better…I'm going to write another chapter RIGHT now. In fact! As you're reading this, all you have to do is scroll down to get another chapter! Presto! Like magic. Don't worry! This one won't be nearly as sad.

LividDream: Shhhhhh! We're not supposed to talk about my bad grammar. If we don't talk about it, it doesn't exist! I do my best. I'm horrible at English and there's only so much correcting Microsoft word can do! Ha ha. Thanks for your support and for the review.

DallyxSodaJDLuvinHoods: Yeah I know! They could have avoided it all! But neither of them had the guts to tell the other about it and now we have another mess of problems. Thank you for the review. I love frequent reviewers! You're so awesome!

Dess: Oh my gosh! That review was so sweet! I'm so flattered I'm going to get Joey a dog! I know just how I'll bring it into the story! Thank you so much for your support.

who really cares about pennames anyway: I know. Go Joey! Growing some guts! Haha. Thanks for the review. (And all the other reviews you've left me.) I really appreciate it.

Rugrats101: Ha ha. Yeah. It was pretty sad. I'm going to write up a new chapter right after I type these up. Thank you for all the reviews you've left. It really means a lot to me.

angeloves1: Don't cry! (Gives you hug) Crap! Still crying…Wait! I know. (Hits the update story button) YaY! Ha ha. Thank you for all the reviews you've left. You're one of the best ones to hear from!

Sodapop's#1gurl: Thank you so much for the review. I'll try to update more often. I always have ideas floating around in my head but I can't be typing up stories while anyone in my house is around because I'm one of those closet-fic writers. Ha ha.

Thank you guys so much for the reviews! Twelve reviews for chapter 10...In one day! How awesome is that? Ha ha. Thank you all for showing so much support. I'm just waiting for the sad day when I get my first flame. It's going to make me heartbroken but hopefully I'll remember how many people enjoy this and I'll come to my senses.

I'm not sure about this chapter. It seems too…uppedy? And cliché… Don't expect anything spectacular in this one…I don't think I like it too much. (And I'm 90 sure it's the worse chapter so far.)

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Joey's POV

The funeral was over. The relatives were all out of my house and I could finally get some peace and quiet.

I hadn't seen any of the boys since the night I told Soda he was never there for me. Thinking back to the look on his face, I wish I hadn't said it. Soda tried to be there for my all those times…just not the way I needed him.

'What about your birthday' The little voice in my head told me it was right of me to say that to him but all I could think was that it would never be the same between me and Soda again.

I'd have to face him today though. Darry was driving me to the airport where my thirty-year-old cousin Melissa would be arriving. I was nervous. I was supposed to be the daughter that she never had. I didn't want to disappoint her. She was probably thinking of a pretty blonde girl with pink shirts and fluffy skirts. I already knew she wouldn't like me.

I tried to look like a girl my age was supposed to. I was close to fifteen years old and I wanted to look like a young woman was supposed to.

After thinking long and hard about this, I thought it best to find something of my mothers to wear. It felt weird to be going through her things but I wanted to make Melissa like me. If I was going to be living with her, she was going to like me. I didn't want a repeat of mom.

I stood in front of Laura Jacobs closet and began digging through drawers and sifting through hangers. She had a lot more clothes than I remembered.

All the way in the back of the closet was a soft light blue skirt that would come down right above my knees. After a bit more searching, I found a white long sleeved shirt that was surprisingly knitted like a sweater. I pulled it over my head with the skirt already snug on my hips and began looking for suitable shoes. I eventually found a pair of white sandals that looked casual yet pretty.

I walked back into my room and put on my blue headband and my little silver bracelet with the matching earrings that Uncle Joseph had given me. They matched my silver locket the boys had given me for my fourteenth birthday perfectly. I always wore my locket.

I brushed out my hair and put on a very small amount of makeup. Not enough to let anyone know it was there, but enough to make a subtle difference.

I walked out into the living room and opened the front door. Light flooded into the room as I stood there looking out into the day. It took me a good few minutes to convince myself to keep going. I didn't want to face Soda. Actually, if the boys knew about what I'd said to him, I wouldn't be able to face them either.

I shook the thoughts from my head and pulled the door shut behind me as I began the short walk to the Curtis's.

I was absolutely horrified when I heard a whistle behind me.

'Oh no'

"Hey. What's a pretty lady like you doing out here?" The guy sounded drunk and I was scared to turn around. I walked faster.

"Aw come on! Where ya goin'?" It wouldn't do my any good to run now. I could tell he was close and there was no way I could run very fast in my sandals. I wasn't the best runner in the first place.

"What do you want?" I whipped my head around to look at him and I was even more frightened when I saw there were three of them. The one who I assumed had been talking must have noticed my eyes get wider because he smirked at me and began to step closer.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I was relieved to see Dallas Winston standing behind me with a bored expression on his face.

"You see this girl right here?" Dally asked them as he nodded down at me "You ever touch this girl…you die." He stated it like a fact that he had known for years and was tired of repeating. I looked up and Dally and saw that his expression looked as bored and uncaring as his voice was. I knew it was just for show, but I admired his calmness. There were after all three of them.

"Oh…" The big one in the middle looked horror-struck and immediately turned around and walked the other way, the others following behind him.

Dally smirked at me but he didn't say anything.

"So what are you all dolled up for anyway?" We started walking in the direction of the Curtis's.

"My older cousin, Melissa, is going to be at the airport soon and Darry's going to take me to meet her there. She's going to live with me so I don't have to go to New York."

"Oh yeah…I heard about your mom. How are you holding up?" He looked a bit uncomfortable talking about it.

"I'm okay…" A silence settled around us as we approached the Curtis's house.

"So?" He raised his eyebrows.

"So what?" I was confused.

"Soda." He looked at me like I was stupid. How was I supposed to know what he was talking about? I sighed.

"What about him?" I really didn't want to talk about it right now.

"Anything happening?" He was amused and I was expected to humor him.

"No," My shoulders sunk down even further as I told Dally all that had happened since the night we last talked.

"Oh…" He didn't know what to say and I couldn't blame him.

"Yeah, he probably hates me now." There was no way in Hell I was going to cry now.

Dally rolled his eyes.

"Nah. You guys are all buddy, buddy. Even if you don't get everything you want, you'll always be friends." He seemed to dismiss my opinion on the situation and began walking up the steps to their house.

"You know Dally, you're really good at cheering people up." I smiled at him and punched him in the shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. " He rolled his eyes again. "Just don't tell anyone." He smirked at me and then went inside. I followed.

"Joey!" Two-Bit hollered from his spot on the floor in front of the TV.

Steve looked up from his chocolate cake and laughed when he saw me.

I was confused again.

"Nice skirt" He chuckled through a mouthful of cake. I laughed and rolled my eyes as I took a seat on the couch beside Johnny.

"Hey Johnny!" I winked at him. He immediately blushed. He's so shy I couldn't help myself.

Pony, who was sitting on the floor beside Two-Bit and I laughed at him.

I looked up to see Soda coming into the room. His eyes met mine for a moment before he turned his attention to the chocolate cake Steve was eating.

"Want some cake Joey?" Soda asked through a mouthful of cake as well. He was smiling like an idiot. I guess he chose to forget what I had said to him and I was grateful for it. I laughed and shook my head no.

I then noticed a girl was beside Johnny on the couch that I had never seen before. She had long wavy blonde hair and deep blue eyes. She was very attractive. I wondered whose girlfriend she was.

"Oh yeah!" Soda washed down the cake in his mouth with a bottle of coke and pointed to the girl.

"Joey, this is Sandy. Sandy, this is Joey!" He was still smiling like an idiot.

I didn't let anyone see the look of hurt that had to have crossed my expression as I quickly covered it with a friendly smile.

"Hi" I stuck my hand out for her to shake. She gladly accepted it. "Hey"

After a few minutes Johnny got up and joined Two-Bit and Pony on the floor.

"So Soda tells me a lot about you." Sandy shifted on the couch so that she was facing me.

"Really?" I playfully winked at Soda across the room. He laughed and returned it.

Sandy chuckled at us.

"The way he talked about you being on of the guys…it never crossed my mind you weren't a guy." She meant this as a joke but I didn't think it was very funny at all.

"Surprise, surprise." I forced a small laugh as I looked to the TV screen.

'Mickey Mouse again?' I rolled my eyes.

"Oh I love your shoes! Where did you get them?" She was staring at my shoes with admiration.

"They were my mothers." Why on earth did she have to ask that.

Her face fell.

"Oh, yes. Soda tells me she passed away not long ago." She probably meant it as a question but I wasn't going to answer her. I heard Dally grunt from his chair by the window.

As soon as she had asked about it, Soda immediately stood up and walked over to Sandy.

"It's getting late. We better be going." He pulled her off the couch and put his arm about her shoulders. He smiled apologetically at me.

"Oh yes." Sandy smiled at him. "Lets go then"

"See you later Joey…We're all going to the Dingo. Come on guys!" Soda lead Sandy out the door and Two-Bit, Steve, Johnny, Pony, and Dally all followed them.

Darry took this time to come out of the bathroom. He was obviously in the shower.

"I'm going to get dressed. I'll take you to get your aunt in a second." He nodded towards me before heading in the direction of his room.

"Cousin" I corrected before he disappeared.

"Oh wait! I forgot my purse!" I heard Sandy yell from outside. I looked to the other end of the couch and saw a small handbag.

She walked into the room and looked over her shoulder to see if anyone was behind her.

"Listen here Missy" she was pointing her finger at me "Soda is MY boyfriend."

"What?" What was the matter with this girl?

"I see the way you look at him!" She pointed her accusing finger at me again.

"He's my friend. I'm allowed to look at him!" I was getting angry.

"Not like that, you aren't!" She was trying to keep her voice down and I was smart enough to keep my voice only as loud as hers.

I rolled my eyes at her and sunk back into the couch. I was finished arguing with this delusional fraud.

She stalked over, grabbed her purse, and pointed her finger back at me.

"If you try to get between me and Soda, I'll make sure he never so much as looks at you again." She leaned back slightly and put her hands on her hips.

"I think mine and Soda's friendship is more important than his psycho girlfriend!" I stood up in front of her.

"We'll see" she smirked at me and went out the door. I was fuming as I plopped back down on the couch and crossed my arms.

"You ready to go?" Darry emerged from the hallway, fully clothed, and waited for my reply.

I grunted and headed out the door.

He looked a bit confused when he came out behind me but he shook it off pretty fast.

"So do you know anything about her yet?" Darry was usually the strong silent one but I suppose he didn't like the odd silence. I sighed and forgot about Sandy.

"Um…She's thirty." I couldn't remember anything else. He laughed.

"Good memory" He commented.

"I know" I got a smug smile on my face as I held back a laugh.

We got to the airport and found that her plane had already landed. We searched the place for about twenty minutes before a young looking blonde woman walked over to us.

"Joey?" she asked looking at me. The woman was gorgeous. Tall and slender. Her blonde hair was in large delicate waves and she was wearing a bright pink sweater and matching shoes.

"Yes?" I don't know why I asked. If she knew my name she was obviously Melissa.

"Oh! I'm Melissa! You're even more beautiful than I expected! Cute shoes! And what pretty hair you have!" She went on about my outfit and my hair for a few minutes before Darry finally figured he was making this awkward and led us all to his truck.

He carried three large suitcases with him and Melissa wheeled a slightly smaller one behind her.

I was startled when I heard her luggage..erm…bark?

Melissa seemed to notice my confusion and stopped to show me what was in the case. I looked into the small opening that had a sort of net keeping its contents in.

I peeked in to see the cutest puppy I had ever seen. It was a wheat golden color and had big brown eyes.

"Awww!" I couldn't help myself. It was adorable.

"Do you like your present?" She was smiling at me.

"For me?" I couldn't believe it. This cute little thing was mine.

"I thought you'd like it." We continued our way to Darry's truck where he was waiting for us. I was beginning to like this crazy woman in the passenger seat.


	12. Real Love

kaligirl05: Yeah, Melissa is going to be an odd character. I wanted to make her…the uh…comic relief! Yeah. Someone to lighten the mood sometimes. I wanted to bring a mean girlfriend into the story and I thought "Who better than Sandy!"

Sodapop's#1gurl: I have a reason for making Soda act like nothing ever happened but I can't tell you yet. You'll find out in the next chapter though. Not this one, but Soda's birthday on the next one. Oh yeah! I really wanted to bring Melissa in to help her with her love problems…plus I needed someone to make Joey a bit happier at times. I think it was a good idea and I hope you guys like her.

Dess: I love dogs too. I have a pug. He's so adorable. Lol. I thought pugs were ugly until I got him. He's gorgeous.

LividDream: I know! Puppy/good. Sandy/gross! Ha ha. I don't have a problem with you telling me about my grammar and stuff. I was just joking about that. I know it needs a little work but Microsoft word doesn't tell me where commas go and that's the main issue. I never really understood commas. It's always too little and too few. It's pretty funny that I can manage A's in all my classes and not know how to use commas. There's public education for you! I do my best and I'm working on it. I'll get the hang of it sooner or later. I've read through this chapter a few times and I don't see any errors. (Any that I'd know how to fix anyway.) Ha ha. Thanks for the reviews. Oh yeah, I figured I could make Sandy the mean girlfriend in my story because she really wasn't talked about too often in the book. The only person who ever really described her is Soda so I figured I could play the whole "She's a witch behind my back" thing. Thanks for your support.

blondie0589: I know! I hope she goes down too! Ha ha. Thanks for the review.

DallyxSodaJDLuvinHoods: Seriously! But if I got Dally to kill her off then I'd have to put him in jail (to clear my conscious) and I'd have to find somebody else to play the witch. We'll just have to tolerate her…for now. Mwa ha ha ha ha ha! Always good to hear from you!

angeloves1: Why thank you! Its always good to hear from you too! Thanks for all the support.

Who really cares about pennames anyway: I know…I had to resist making Joey slap her. Ha ha. Thanks for all the reviews you've left. It means a lot to me.

WoPo12: Sandy is blonde? Crap! Crap! Crap! Um…She dyed her hair! Yeah! That's my story and I'm sticking to it! Ha ha. Thanks for the reviews.

Rugrats101: Hey yeah! What am I gonna name the puppy? I'll figure it out…hopefully it will have a name this chapter if I don't forget. Ha ha. Thanks for the reviews.

st.elmo-lover: Thank you! I wasn't sure if I should let Sandy be the mean girlfriend I had in mind but I think it'll be okay. The book didn't talk about her too much so I figured I could get away with shaping her character to my liking. Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Thank you guys for all the reviews. You all are so awesome!

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Joey's POV

The next week was very interesting. Melissa had squealed when she saw the house. She said it had "possibilities". I didn't want to know what that meant. Probably work.

We had spent the next couple of days eating at her restaurant on the East side and scraping paint off the walls. Inside and out. It was a bit weird going to the East side and being treated like a high class soc, but I didn't mind. I though it was kind of funny, actually.

Melissa wanted to re-do the entire house. At first, she wanted a white house with pink shutters and a white picket fence, but I told her a picket fence would probably get us killed in this neighborhood. She finally settled on a white house with blue shutters and no picket fence.

She was a very entertaining person. She saw beauty in everything and she acted as if she didn't have a care in the world. Actually, she didn't. All she had to do was make sure her restaurants were taken care of and that I was kept track of. I made myself easy to take care of. I cleaned up after myself, did the dishes, and everything else she asked me to.

She didn't ask for much though. All she every really wanted me to do was help her fix the house up. She loved making things pretty. She even liked doing my hair. She has a strange obsession with braided pigtails so I wore them sticking out of my baseball cap a lot.

Today we were finally painting. We were just going to paint the outside. I don't know how she figures we can get it all done in one day, but I humor her anyway.

"Joey! Let's go buy some paint!" It sounded like she was hollering from the kitchen. I laughed.

"But we've been three times to buy paint! Don't we have enough yet?" Every other day she would think of a different color she wanted to paint the living room or her room. It was pretty comical.

"The more the merrier!" She laughed.

I chuckled slightly and made my way down the hall. It was a bit hard maneuvering around the dozens of paint cans, but I managed. Melissa was already waiting at the door.

She tugged on one of my braids and handed me one of my hats so we could be on our way.

Melissa couldn't drive so we always walked or called a cab. We only took a cab if it was dark though.

I hadn't been spending much time with the boys lately. Not since my little encounter with…ugh! Sandy. Her name turned to ash in my mouth. I felt disgusted even thinking about her.

I've never been in a fight before, but something tells me that wouldn't be the last time she got to me.

Soda's birthday was in two days. I couldn't think about it without remembering my birthday. The birthday only made so 'great' when Soda left for one of his girlfriends.

Whoever that girl was, I'm sure I would have liked her more than Sandy.

"What's the matter kiddo?' Melissa was laughing at me.

"What do you mean?" Gosh. Was this lady psychic?

"You look angry." We walked into the home decoration store.

I didn't see the harm in telling her.

"Okay…We'll my best friend has a girlfriend and she jumped all over me saying I was trying to take Soda away from her when he wasn't in the room and I was like-"

"You're that mad about some girl accusing you of taking her drink?" She had her brows furrowed together. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Soda is my best friend's name." I had a feeling she already knew that and was just trying to lighten the mood.

"Oh, right." She looked through the various paint colors as she took a long pause. "Well, are you?" She glanced up at me for a moment.

"What?" I absently flipped through the color booklets.

"Trying to take him away from her?" She looked at me with a smirk on her lips and her hands in her hips.

"No, of course not." I shook my head and began searching through the colors myself.

"Uh-huh." There was an odd tone to her voice, but I let it slide.

"How about this?" I picked up a light yellow color.

She shook her head before she wandered to the right and her eyes lit up.

"This!" She picked up a little card with a light blue color on it. "I'm going to use this color for the shutters…and for my room!" She was very excited. I laughed again. She had a tendency to make me laugh a lot and I sure as hell wasn't complaining.

We got two cans of the color mixed for us and we headed back home.

"What should I name the puppy?" I scratched my chin as I pondered names.

"You haven't named that poor thing yet?" Her voice rose slightly, still I knew she was kidding.

"I can't think of anything." I shrugged.

"Well, you'd better think of something soon. If you call it puppy long enough it won't answer to anything else." Melissa seemed amused. Hell, she was always amused.

We finally made it back home and we immediately started getting brushes and things we would need to paint.

It was very sunny outside and it was only twelve o'clock.

We spent the entire afternoon painting and having paint wars. After four hours of brushing paint on the outside of the house, we only had about a third of it done.

"We'll get it done in one day she says!" I mocked her as I dipped my brush back into the white paint.

"Ah, shut up!" She punched my shoulder lightly and flicked a bit of paint on me. I didn't really care. I was already covered in other paint she had gotten me with. I laughed when I saw she had more paint on her than the house did.

I started thinking of me and Soda again.

"Melissa," I didn't really know what words to use "how do you know if you're in love?"

"Who are you in love with?" She looked down from her position on the porch and cocked an eyebrow at me.

"Soda" I mumbled.

"Huh?" She was laughing at me again.

"Soda." I said it loudly and clearly so she could hear me. She laughed again. What a crazy lady.

"I thought you weren't trying to steal him from his girl?"

"I'm not." I proceeded to tell her all about mine and Soda's relationship. From the day I met him to now.

I watched the puppy run in big circles around the yard as Melissa thought long and hard about everything I'd just told her.

"So what was the question again?" Man, did she have a short attention span.

"How do you know if you're in love?" I felt hopeless and now I was even debating if what I felt was real.

"You tell me what you think love is like, make sure it fits the picture, and I'll tell you if it's love or not." She sat down where she stood and stuck her head through the railing of the porch to look down at me.

"Okay…" I didn't really know what to say so I just started talking about how I felt about Soda. "You constantly want to be closer to him. You can't picture yourself with anyone else, not even movie stars…um...Its not when you're looking at each other…more like when you're looking at the same thing together. It hurts so bad to see him with another girl my chest even burns-" She cut me off.

"That sounds about right." She smiled at me and stood up to resume painting as if I'd never said anything.

"So I'm in love?" I always believed I was in love, but I really wanted to hear it from her.

"Sounds like it." She turned on one foot and looked at the puppy playing in the yard.

"How about Cody?"

"What?" Who was Cody?

She rolled her eyes.

"A name" She was getting impatient, but I was even more confused now. "For the dog!"

"Oh," I raised my shoulders sheepishly and nodded.

Melissa got a triumphant smile on her face.

"Cody it is!" She proclaimed loudly as she continued watching the puppy. Cody wasn't a bad name for him. It was kind of cute.

"Hey," I hated bugging her about advice so much today, but I couldn't help it. "Soda's birthday is in two days…any ideas?"

"Walk out halfway through it?" It was supposed to be funny, but as I thought about it more, it seemed like an alright idea. He did do it to me. I'd never do that though.

"I meant a present." Now it was my turn to roll my eyes.

"Oh…um. How about a bag full of candy and a huge chocolate cake? We could even make the cake at the restaurant." It wasn't a bad idea.

"Yeah!" Melissa was so smart. "Great idea."

"Well, it was my idea so it had to be good." She laughed at her own joke and continued painting.

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Hey guys. This chapter was more or less pointless, but I think it was necessary. Maybe…I don't know. The next chapter will be Soda's birthday. He'll be turning seventeen.

Let me know what you guys think about this chapter.


	13. Shatter

Lady Rose 05: I know. Melissa is awesome. Sandy is…not. Ha ha. Thanks for the review.

kaligirl05: Why thank you! I'll update ASAP. Thanks for your support.

SodaNDallysgrl410:Ha ha ha! Suspense is my middle name! Actually its…well I'm not going to tell you. Let's just say my parents listened to a lot of country and drop the whole subject. Lol. Thanks for the reviews!

blondie0589: I had a reason for Soda acting like Joey never said anything to him. Don't worry, you'll see this chapter. I hope you won't be disappointed with it. Thanks for the review.

Sodapop's#1gurl: Your question will be answered this chapter. I thought it was a pretty good idea but I won't know until I start getting reviews for this so let me know what you think. Always good to hear from you!

stardust104: Lol. Thank you. I thought the name Cody was cute. I know. I wish I had a crazy cousin like Melissa too! Thanks for the review.

Rugrats101: What a coincidence! I'm updating right now! Ha ha. Thanks for all the reviews!

WoPo12: Lol. Yeah. I need to work on that. I finally broke down and fixed chapter eleven. Sandy is now blonde as she was meant to be. It took me forever to get the chance to fix it but I don't think anyone will notice! He he! Thanks for the reviews.

Who really cares about pennames anyway: I will update soon! As a matter of fact, I think I'll update right now! Ha ha. Thanks for the reviews.

IMPORTANT: It has been brought to my attention that Sandy is a blonde in the book so I went back to chapter eleven and fixed it. Also, anyone wondering why Soda was acting like nothing was ever said to him will be happy to know that you'll find out why this chapter. Sorry for the wait and the confusion.

Oh yeah, don't be too disappointed if this chapter seems a bit…anticlimactic. It's sure not the end of the story so I wouldn't get too angry…unless you really want to get angry. Just PLEASE blow off your steam on something other than me. Thank you!

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Joey's POV

I sat on the foot of my bed and played with Cody. We had finally finished the outside of the house last night and Soda's birthday was tomorrow. I was worn out and we hadn't even gone to make the cake yet.

Today we had painted Melissa's room, the hallway, and a bit of the kitchen. The funny part is that it was only six o'clock when we finished. Tomorrow we would paint my room before Soda's party. I had my work cut out for me.

For the past three hours I had been lounging around my room and talking to Cody. I knew he couldn't really understand me, but I was sure he would like the attention anyway.

All we had to do tonight was go to Melissa's restaurant and bake a big chocolate cake.

I didn't bother changing from my paint covered jeans. Melissa would probably get cake batter all over me anyway. She loved seeing the expression on my face when she surprised me with paint or pancake mix. Making a mess was one of the finer parts of the day and I would never complain about it.

I whispered a soft goodbye to Cody and walked into the living room where Melissa was sprawled out on the couch.

"I'm buying a new couch when we paint this room." She grumbled and stood up stretching.

I laughed at her and pulled my baseball cap over my braided pigtails. I had gotten a bit tired of the hairstyle, but it kept the hair from my eyes while I was painting so I didn't bother taking it out.

I walked into the night air and made my way towards the cab that I assumed Melissa had called.

I opened the back door and crawled into the far side while Melissa climbed in after me.

We finally made it to the restaurant and Melissa pulled out a key from her pocket. The place was obviously closed this late at night and I was thankful that she remembered it would be locked.

We spent the next three hours running in circles trying to make the perfect chocolate cake. We even decorated it to say "Happy 17th Birthday" on the top and "Soda" on the sides. Not too shabby.

We called another cab and waited inside the building for it to arrive. When it did, we carefully picked up the cake and hauled it inside. The driver laughed and waited patiently for us to get situated before he drove off.

The ride home seemed shorter than the one to the restaurant and I was thankful for it. It was a bit difficult fitting in the back of the taxi with that big cake.

Melissa paid the driver and we both carefully walked the cake into the kitchen. It was only then I noticed how late it was. A few more hours and it would be daylight.

"Alright," Melissa yawned "get some sleep and we'll paint your room and buy that candy when you wake up."

"Alright," I stifled a yawned as I practically crawled into my bed. Cody was already asleep on my pillow so I settled down beside him and pulled the string on my lamp.

I awoke to the sound of ridiculously loud music. I didn't recognize the artist, but it was obviously a girl singing and it sounded like the kind of music you would listen to all night while you had a pillow fight. Very girly and cheery. I laughed and threw the covers off my bed. Cody poked his head out from the sheet and barked at me.

"Oh, I'm sorry boy." I laughed and picked him up. I scratched his head as I followed the music into the living room.

"There you are" Melissa was standing at the far end of the living room with open paint cans and brushes.

"I thought we were going to paint my room today?" I noticed all the furniture was pushed to the middle of the room as I put Cody on the floor and peeked into the paint cans.

"Well, all the stuff in your room is against the walls and by the time we get it moved, you'll have to go to your boyfriend's party!" She laughed at me.

"He's not my boyfriend" I giggled as I picked up a brush and flung some of the lime green paint on her.

She just shrugged and began painting. I rolled my eyes and helped her for the next few hours.

At five o'clock, we were almost done so I let Melissa finish and I headed to my room to get some clothes. I picked out a pair of old jeans and a white t-shirt.

I grabbed a towel from the hallway closet and went to take a shower.

By the time I showered, got ready, went to buy the candy, and came back for the cake, it was seven o'clock. The boys would already be at the party so I thanked Melissa for all the help and I slung the bag over my shoulder as I hauled the large cake down the road.

I wish I would have thought a better was to get that big cake to the Curtis's, but my stupidity didn't bother me when I finally made it there with the cake in one piece.

The door was already open so I just squeezed through the doorway and headed into the kitchen. The living room was packed. I didn't even know half the people. Of course everyone would want to celebrate Sodapop Curtis's birthday. Everyone loved Soda.

"Hey!" I heard Soda's voice as an arm flung over my shoulders and steered me back into the living room.

"Joey! Hey Soda, she's got a bag!" Two-Bit was trying to grab the bag off my arm, but I withdrew it and laughed at him. I'd forgotten Soda was so close. If I would have remembered, I would have had enough sense to hold it on my other side. He snatched the bag away and laughed at me as he took a few steps back so I couldn't get it from him.

His face lit up when he looked into the bag.

"There's enough candy in here for a year!" I laughed at him and plopped down on an empty spot on the couch.

To my annoyance, Sandy just happened to be right beside me.

"Hello Jacky," Her voice was cool, but anyone passing would have just thought she was bored. I knew she did it out of spite.

"Joey" I grumbled as I leaned back into the couch and crossed my arms.

"Such a manly name. I should have remembered." Sandy looked down disgustedly at my clothes. She was talking only slightly above a whisper and I knew she was being careful not to be heard buy anyone but me. I wish I would have been as smart. I was so angry I didn't notice Soda coming over.

"Oh yeah! You're that bitch Sodas dating! Where are my manners? Are you having fun tonight? Planning on going home with any of the lucky studs while Soda isn't looking?" I loved sarcasm. Sandy looked taken back and put her hand on her chest.

"What? No, I was just trying to be friendly to you. It's okay if you don't want to be friends." She looked hurt and it was confusing the Hell out of me.

"Joey?" I looked up to see Soda standing over the couch.

"Huh?" I stared at him confused before it finally dawned on me.

I cast a furious glare in Sandy's direction and she smirked while Soda's eyes were fixed on me with bewilderment.

"Joey, we need to talk." I wasn't used to Soda talking to me like that. His voice was firm and cool. I didn't like it one bit.

He turned and headed out the front door and I assumed that was my cue to follow him. I cast one more glare at Sandy and she mockingly blew me a kiss goodbye as I walked outside.

As soon as we stepped outside, the sparks were flying.

"What was that Joey?" He was practically yelling.

"You think I started that?" It really hurt seeing him jump all over me because she set me up, but I couldn't let him see that. He never knew how much he hurt me then and I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he hurt me now.

"Joey, I heard you! 'You're the bitch Soda's dating'. What gives you the right to call my girlfriend names? She was only trying to be nice." Now he was definitely yelling.

"Soda, you have no idea what you're talking about. That girl is psycho!" Okay, so maybe calling someone psycho while I waved my hands in the air and yelled wasn't a very good idea, but I couldn't help it. I was becoming hysterical.

"Why are you being like this?" His voice was a bit softer now.

"Like what!" As his voice calmed, mine skyrocketed.

"You're not like you used to be Joey," He paused and scratched the back of his neck. "It's so hard being around you anymore. For the past couple of moths, you've been somewhere else and I can't even talk to you. You don't come around as often as you used to and when you are around, you're not around. Not really." He took another long pause. I was hoping he wouldn't continue because he was really hurting me now and I didn't know if I could take anymore.

"As much as I try to ignore it all, the more it becomes a problem. When you told me I was never there for you, I sucked it up and took it. I didn't say anything about it, no matter how much it hurt, and I took it like a man and forgot. But this Joey," He shook his head. "This isn't you Joey. You've changed so much."

"Soda-"

"Maybe you should go home Joey." He was staring at the ground with no expression at all.

I stood there in shock. Tears were running down my cheeks and I couldn't breathe.

Soda looked up at me and looked a bit shaken when he saw my face.

I turned and ran all the way home.

This was what it was like to really break down.

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I hope you guys liked it. I didn't do everything the exact way I had it in mind so I have no idea if this is any good. Let me know what you think.


	14. So Cold

I'm sooooo sorry this has taken so long. I've been traveling with my family A LOT and I hadn't had enough time to think out this story too much. I'm starting school again in less than two weeks so I don't know how frequent my updates will be, but I'll do my best. If I can get enough computer time, maybe I'll be able to hurry and get out a few chapters before then. It's all chance at this point. I can't promise anything.

soda'sgirl wdonabella: But what would be the fun in that? Don't worry, everything will work out for the best. Smiles and nods like a crazy person Thanks for your support. It means a lot to me.

Dess:Haha. I remember that in the Princess Diaries. Those movies are like my guilty pleasure. I love them. Thanks for the review.

Angeloves1:Thank you! As always, I love hearing from you.

Emma:Thank you so much! That was sooooo sweet!

Wopo12:I know. How stupid of Soda. Haha. Thanks for your review! Smiles

UrnotSethCohen:I know! Soda is such a jerk. Why can't he see its all his fault? tears up sniffle Thanks for the review. Sniffle

SodaNDallysgrl410:Haha. That review was hilarious. "Soda must die!" Thanks for that. I was laughing my head off.

Rugrats101:Awww. I didn't want to make you cry. I'm sorry. Thanks for the review though. Tries to cheer you up

Karlei Shaynner:Thank you. I'm glad you like it.

Sodapop's#1gurl:I know. Theres all kinds of drama floating around. Thanks for your support.

Rae:Thank you. I'm glad you like it.

Lady rose 05:I know! What a jerk! I hope he gets nicer too but we'll just have to wait and see! Thanks for the review.

RachieBabe:I know. I need to make them a bit longer. I'm gonna try to work on that a bit. Thanks for your support. I love hearing from you guys.

Kaligirl05:I know. How cold of him. I'm sorry I made you cry too! I've really got to work on that. I make too many people cry. Lol. Thank you for reviewing my story.

An anonymous review said...

" omg i LOVE this story! Soda almost made me cry :(  
you need to update soon!  
i hate Sandy! But Melissa is so awesome!" Thank you for your kind words stranger. I have no idea who you are but I appreciate your support.

Miss showjumper:Thank you. I hope you didn't cry while I took FOREVER. I'm very sorry. I'll try to make it up to you guys.

Sassy6972482:I know. There are so many bad things going on. They'll get sorted out eventually. Don't worry. Thanks for your support.

Valeria:Thanks for your reviews and I know I took a really long time. I'm really sorry and I'm going to try to make up for it.

Katy0977:Haha. Thank you. I appreciate your review very much. smiles

Ashley:Well, he's as sweet as Dally can be. Haha. I love his character. Hes so...mysterious? I don't know, I just like him. Thanks for the review.

Flaming-Angel-1:I'm working on the whole making people cry thing. I'm sorry you cried. Hopefully I'll do something good someday to make it up to you. Haha. Thanks for the support. It was very kind of you.

TheDiscoxDead:I know. Shes horrible. Thanks for the review.

Babigrl:I'll update soon...as a matter of fact, I'm updating now! Haha. Sorry for the wait and thank you for the review.

brooklyn xoxangel001xox:Oh no, its not the end. There's a lot more to come. Don't worry. Thanks for the review. It was very nice.

Thank you guys sooooo much for the reviews. I'm sorry it took so long for me to update, but I'll try to make it up to you all now. Thanks to the majority of you who were patient.

I love you guys!

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As I slept that night, I tossed and turned as nightmares flooded my dreams.

My birthday...

"I've got to go...You're okay with that aren't you, Joey?"

Darry and Soda talking in the kitchen...

"I met a girl afterwards anyway"

Sandy...

"I see the way you look at him"

Soda's birthday...

"Maybe you should go home, Joey"

I shot straight up as the last memory scared me awake. I threw my hands over my head as I let out a few defeated sobs.

I was used to Soda hurting me...but not like this. This time he did it on purpose.

I lifted my head to look around my dimly lit room. The first signs of sunlight were beginning to show as I rolled out of bed and into the living room.

I absently admired the new look as I ran my fingers through Cody's fur. I smiled down at him. Cody was one person I could count on to never hurt me.

I'd never be burnt by his harsh words. He'd never walk out on me or find someone better. I would always take great care of Cody.

My thoughts we're brought down when I went back to thinking about Soda.

I wish I could blame it all on Sandy, but it was my fault. I shouldn't have said those things to her. I shouldn't have been so stupid all of these years. I shouldn't have even showed up at Soda's party. And most of all, I shouldn't have fallen in love with my best friend.

I wouldn't be able to say that anymore. Soda _was _my best friend, but not now. I crumbled my body into a tiny ball on the couch as I wrapped my arm around myself. I couldn't believe how fast I had gone from crying to not being able to cry.

I suppose that proved to me that I really do make it worse when I think about it. Good. I deserve this.

A few hours later I heard Melissa walk down the hallway. I turned my head to look at her. She was smiling at me, but her smile faded so quickly, I wasn't sure if it was ever there.

"What's wrong, honey?" Concern. I didn't care so someone had to.

"Everything." It scared me how flat and dry my voice was. I sounded like I wasn't listening to what I was saying. Like I was bored of the world and unwilling to show any emotion towards it. It wasn't that I didn't want to show my feelings; it was just the fact that I had none. No, they were ripped out of me and thrown away.

"What happened?" She sat down and looked at me with sympathy. Of course she could tell something was wrong. I must've looked like a ghost. Pale and empty.

I explained everything to her. Just as emotionless as I felt. I could tell that she didn't know what to think. Maybe if I would have looked angry or hurt as I said it, she would know how to feel. I didn't care. I was only telling her because she asked it of me. Nothing more.

I expected Melissa to tell me 'hard luck' or 'he's suck a jerk'. I didn't expect her to hug me.

"I'm so sorry, Joey." She sounded like she was crying. I hugged her and rubbed her back to calm her down a bit. Shouldn't this be the other way around?

First I was emotionless and now I had confusion. At least it was something.

Melissa and I had brownies and painted some more that afternoon as we talked. We avoided the subjects love, friends, and Soda.

We spent these ours talking about Cody, shopping, paint, colors, decorations, and anything we could think of that stayed away from the topic of Soda. It wasn't hard to tell what we were both thinking, never talking about, but we managed to at least _act_ cheery the entire morning and afternoon.

At eight o'clock that night, I went for a walk. I just needed to get out. Acting cheery and being cheery were two entirely different things. I wanted to find Dally.

Despite his rough ways, he was the only person who never failed to cheer me up. I didn't know how I was supposed to find him. The only time I ever really saw Dally was when he was at the Curtis house and I couldn't go there.

Not only because I didn't want to face Soda...but because I didn't know if he would let me inside. Even with my jacket on, I felt cold. Colder than I had ever felt. And even with Melissa at home, I felt alone. Soda hated me so it was only a matter of time before everyone else did. Hell, they had probably heard everything by now and already hated me.

Dally would understand. He hated Sandy. Dally seemed to be the only one who saw through her, but he wasn't saying anything to the guys, at least not while I was around.

I found my way to Buck's only to find he wasn't there. I sighed as I sat on the steps and waited. I couldn't leave until I saw him. I leaned my head on the railing and eventually fell asleep.

"Joey, shit, Joey!" I was shook awake as Two-Bit yelled at me.

I rubbed my eyes and looked around. It was only Two-Bit.

"What are you doing?" I sat up and rubbed my head that probably had a permanent indention where I had fallen asleep on the railing.

"What am I doing? What are you doing?" His eyes were wide and he was looking at me like I was a crazy person.

"What time is it?" It took me that long to notice that it was dark.

"It's three o'clock in the morning, Joey! Melissa's flipping out!"

A picture of Mom flashed through my head.

"Flipping out? Is she throwing things?" I could hear my voice shake as I searched his face for an answer. He looked a little taken back.

"What? No, she's worried, not nuts!" He laughed at me in an attempt to lighten the mood, but I was already lost. I leant my head back up against the railing as tears slipped down my face.

"Joey..." He sat beside me and threw his arm around my shoulders. I leant into him as he lifted me to my feet.

"We have to get you back. Everyone's looking for you and Melissa looked like she was going to cry." He began leading me into the direction of our street.

"Even Soda?" I couldn't hide the hope from my voice.

Two-Bit looked at me knowingly and sadly shook his head. I avoided his eyes as I looked at me feet. Of course Soda wasn't looking for me. He didn't care.

"Joey...I talked to Soda...and Dallas-" I had to cut him off.

"What have you told Soda?" My voice was loud and demanding.

He sighed. Something I wasn't used to Two-Bit doing.

"Nothing, Joey. I was just listening. I knew you liked Soda...Just not that much. Dally told me a lot about what's been going on and Soda told me what happened between you guys-" I cut him off again.

"Don't worry about it." I was mumbling at this point.

"No, Joey. Look, I know its rough, but that's no reason to make your cousin worry. Especially a pretty one like that but-" I didn't mean to cut him off this time, but I couldn't hold in my laughter.

"What's so funny?" He sounded indignant, but I knew he was joking.

"I forgot about your blonde fetish." I broke into another fit of laughter.

"Oh please, a girl that good looking? I'd like her if she had green hair!" Now we were both laughing.

"Shes twice your age!"

It felt good to be laughing again. I knew it wouldn't last long, but I enjoyed it none the less.

After the laugher finally died down, I finally got up the courage to ask Two-Bit what I needed to know.

"So what has Soda been telling you?" I tried to make it sound casual, but he saw right through that. There was a long pause.

"Soda tells me that you're different, which you don't seem to be, and that you no longer...see eye to eye." He was choosing his words carefully, but I could tell he was biting back some of the anger that had come when the words were originally spoken. I knew that Soda had told him this rather differently.

"He hates me." Now I know my voice sounded crushed.

"No...He doesn't hate you. He's just angry and confused. Being confused just makes you angrier."

"Tell me about it..." I muttered.

I had been so drawn up in the conversation, I didn't notice that we were at my house.

"Thanks for bringing me back. I didn't mean to fall asleep out there. I was just waiting for Dally-"

"Don't worry about it." He stole my words with a smirk as he turned around and headed towards the Curtis house.

I drew in a deep breath and prepared for the worse as I pushed open the door.

"Joey!" I couldn't see anything as I was smothered in a hug.

After Melissa finally let me go I began explaining what happened.

I was surprised how well she was taking it. She wasn't mad at all. She did tell me to make sure she knew next time I was going to be out that late, but she seemed to understand that it was something I had to do.

It was four o'clock when I finally made it to bed. I was in no better shape than I was when I had fallen asleep yesterday, but I felt a little better about my condition this time.

I supposed this was how it was going to be for a long time. Little by little, I would forget about Sodapop Curtis and get on with my life. This would be the last time I would have to get over him because it was finally over with us. No being friends, and no hope of something more.

Because of where I lived and who my friends were, Soda would never be out of my life, but he was finally working his way out of my heart.

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I'm sorry if this seemed boring, but I was totally drawling a blank! I'm not sure what to do next...well...I have a very small idea. One that will only take a few paragraphs, but that's it.

Any ideas? Let me know.

As you can tell, I didn't really know where to go with this chapter either so I really would LOVE to know what you guys think about it. Don't be shy! Review!

Thank you guys for being so patient and don't hesitate you run any ideas past me like what they should do next or any little ideas you may have...I could really use the tips.

Right now, I'm going to bed (its 8am) and hopefully, I'll put out another chapter by this time tomorrow (It'll help if someone gives me some ideas!)

Thanks for reading. "(Your Name Here) is awesome!"

Love you guys!


	15. Strangers

Hey guys! I've got this computer all to myself for a few hours so I figured I'd type out a new chapter while I could! Haha.

To a few of my reviewers…

Mushs-grl13: Yes. They are sort of drifting. Don't worry. Everything will turn out the way it should. Thanks for the review. It was very sweet.

TIM'N DALLYS GURL: Don't worry. I don't think you'll be disappointed in the end. Thanks for the support.

Sodapop's#1gurl: Yes, I'm thinking of something…drastic. Maybe some new OCs. Maybe she does need more friends. Thanks for not forgetting me!

ForzaAzzurri09: Thank you. I was worried it would seem dull. Hopefully, the next few chapters will be better. Thanks for not forgetting me too!

Angeloves1: Yeah, I would have totally forgotten about my story by now. Haha. But then again, I don't have the best memory in the world…Thanks for sticking with me.

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The next couple of days went by very slowly. Melissa and I finally finished the house and it surprised me how different it looked. It didn't look expensive or 'socy', but it did look cozy and welcoming. It probably only seemed welcoming because it felt like the only place I was welcome.

I had only talked to Dally,Two-Bit, and Melissa over the last few days.

It felt horrible not being at Soda's house. It wasn't that I missed Soda. It was just that missed everyone else. Everyone hung around their house and I was only visited when I was remembered. I suppose it was easy for them to forget about me.

Dally and Two-Bit were the only ones who saw me every day. I had a strange suspicion Two-Bit only came around to get a glimpse at Melissa, but I appreciated it none the less.

Strangely enough, Dally and Two-Bit never came around to talk about Soda. We only talked about what kind of trouble they got themselves into and what was going on 'on the street'. They kept trying to get me to go places with them, but I always refused.

I spent my days brooding and getting over Sodapop. The main thought that I was always focused on was that I would never have to go through this again. After this, I would be done.

I was getting a lot better and I finally decided it was time to leave the house.

Dallas and Two-Bit were both sitting on my front steps smoking when I came outside. After a bit of small talk, they asked me if I wanted to go to a party at Buck's with them. I surprised them by saying yes.

"Princess Joey is finally leaving her castle!" Two-Bit feigned shock as he held his chest in a manor that suggested a heart attack. I laughed at him.

"You aren't gonna get drunk and jump me again are you?" Dally always had a perverted sense of humor. I shot him a glare and rolled my eyes as Two-Bit burst out laughing. I punched him in the shoulder as I returned my attention back to Dally.

"No, I am not." I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to look indignant.

"Damn." He cursed as he stood up and smirked down at me. I was used to Dallas Winston cracking those kinds of jokes…just not towards me. I took it as a compliment. Maybe he really didn't see me as a kid. I was, after all, almost fifteen. I chuckled at him and went inside to change my clothes.

I grabbed a pair of faded jeans and a blue tank top. I left my loose braided pig-tails in and put my navy blue baseball cap on. I laughed at the way I coordinated as I pulled on my blue converse.

When we finally made it to the party, I wasn't as shocked as I was last time. There were still people practically going at it everywhere, but it was something I was expecting at a party like this. Two-Bit headed off in the direction of a pretty blonde as Dally put a hand on my shoulder.

"If you get drunk again, don't tackle a stranger." He winked at me before he disappeared into the crowd. I was glad he left. I must have been blushing horribly.

Two-Bit and Dally told me that Soda, Steve, Pony, and Johnny were at the movies so I didn't have to be worried about bumping into any of them. Of course Darry wouldn't show up either. He was always working and he wouldn't be caught dead here.

I didn't have anything to worry about.

I decided I need to have some fun and I felt the party would seem a lot more fun if I was a little drunk, so I headed towards the kitchen in search of something alcoholic. I walked in to find three guys sitting at the counter pouring tequila shots.

I had only been drunk once before so it didn't take too many to get me totally wasted. I was having fun though so I didn't care.

"Okay, I draw the line at five!" I was laughing again. It was obviously due to the large amount of alcohol in my system, but I didn't care. I was thinking clearly, I was just amused. Highly amused.

The guys laughed at me as they poured my last shot. I quickly 'threw it down' and threw my hands up in victory.

"You're so wasted" The blonde one laughed at me. Hell, I was laughing at me. He seemed to be the more sober of the bunch. Still tipsy though.

"Nu-uh!" I chuckled a bit and looked around the bunch. Aside from the blonde one, there was a brunette and a boy with black hair on either side of him. They were even drunker than I was.

"I'm drunk." The brunette proclaimed.

"Yes, you are." I tried to keep a straight voice, but I cracked and burst out laughing.

"If you're this funny when you're sober, I'm going to have to get to know you!" The blonde one was definitely getting there. I didn't really see how that was funny, but I was laughing anyway.

"My name's Andy." I don't know why he chose this time to introduce himself, but I was glad I finally had something to call him.

"And I'm Nathan." The black haired guy on his left slurred his words to the point where they were almost gibberish.

I laughed at him as I turned my attention to the brown haired one to get his name.

I stared at him for a good minute or two before he finally spoke.

"Huh?" Man he was drunk.

I laughed again.

"What's your name?"

"Alex." Now he was laughing too. We were so drunk.

After another shot that I had talked myself into, I had forgotten who was who.

"Okay, so blondie is Andy. The brown haired one is Alex," I looked at the one with the black hair, "and you're Nathan?" I was so confused.

Andy nodded.

"I'm bored." Nathan decided loudly. We all laughed at him.

We ended up playing a game called twister with a few other people. I'd never played before, but I thought it was hilarious. Nobody was doing any 'grabbing' or anything so I didn't have to worry. We were just having fun…Of course that probably wasn't what it looked like to someone walking by…

Of all the people to walk by, of course Sandy had to be the one to see me.

"I knew you were a whore." She had her hands on her hips and I felt like walking over and slapping her silly.

"I'm playing twister." I grumbled at her.

"Sure you are…" With that, she turned and walked out of the room. I rolled my eyes as I realized it was my turn. Andy and I were in the worst position. We were both practically tangled in each other. Not that I minded.

I flicked the spinner and it landed on green. Everyone groaned as I laughed. In going to green, I knocked two people out of the game and made myself a bit more comfortable. Andy was laughing as hard as I was as Nathan and some girl recovered from the fall and took seats on the floor to watch the game.

In the end, Andy and I tied because Alex came and pushed us over. I didn't care. I was still a bit drunk so I thought it was hilarious.

We started another game and Dally and Two-Bit came in right as I got eliminated and laughed at me. Two-Bit was VERY drunk and Dally appeared to be right up there with him.

Before we left, I told Andy, Alex, and Nathan where I lived. They were a lot of fun to hang out with and Andy was very cute in a boyish sort of way. He wasn't a boy though. All three of them were seventeen.

I had found out they all lived as far from my house as you could possibly get without crossing into soc territory, which wasn't extremely far, but far enough that I couldn't walk there alone.

I'd just have to hope they wouldn't forget about me or where I lived.

That night, for the first time in a _long time, _I fell asleep with a big smile on my face.

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Whadda ya think guys? Like the new characters? Yay or nay?


	16. Sadistic

Hey guys…

Rugrats101: Yeah, the new guys aren't exactly a 'catching on', but they're going to be around for awhile anyway. Thanks for the review. I really appreciate it.

Miranda: Yeah, I know. The last two chapters have been uneventful and you guys have barely seen any of the guys. That's kinda the point though…Its just something that had to happen for the next part in the story. Don't worry about it. You'll see all our guys soon. wink

mushs-grl13: Wow! Thank you! You're like the only person who liked the new characters. Everyone else will just have to suck it up and get used to them. Don't worry though. I'll have all the outsiders in this chapter. Thanks for reviewing.

Kait-Lynn23: I can't answer _any_ of those questions. Lol. Don't worry though. All will be revealed in time. Thanks for reviewing.

Sodapop's#1gurl: I plan on making the new guys very funny and very kind. Don't worry though. No love interests so far as I know. Always good to hear from you.

Melrbd: Thank you. That was very kind of you to say. smiles Thanks for reviewing.

Kaligirl05: Haha. Did you have fun? Thanks for reviewing.

SodaNDallysgrl410: I've given a little though to Dally and Joey hooking up, but not much. I don't think its going to happen, but it COULD at some point. I don't know yet. We'll just have to wait and see. As usual, good to hear from you.

angeloves1: Yeah, I think that's why I hate her too. Lol. Could you tell? Haha. It's always good to hear from you!

ALWAYS, ALWAYS good to hear from you all.

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I went to sleep with a smile, but I woke up with a headache. Even trade I suppose.

Once again, my memory was a little fuzzy, but I remembered making new friends. They were a lot of fun and I hoped I'd see them soon.

Today Melissa and I were going to go buy a new couch and eat lunch at her restaurant. After listening to her countless complaints about it, it was obvious if we didn't replace it, I would slap her. Of course I would never slap her; I just didn't want to hear her complaining.

I was very proud of myself. I'd been up for a few minutes already and I hadn't thrown up. I made my way into the kitchen and took a few aspirin before grabbing some clothes and heading towards the shower.

After I felt clean enough, I dressed in jeans and a T-shirt and walked out into the hall. I saw Cody sitting on the floor by my door and I instantly felt bad. I'd forgotten Cody liked sleeping beside me at night so I didn't let him in before I went to bed. I picked him up and scratched his ears as I walked back into the kitchen to search for the dog treats. I found them and gave him a few before I walked down the hall to Melissa's room. It was two o'clock and she wasn't even awake yet.

"Melissa!" I pounded on the door and waited for a reply. After a few minutes of waiting, I opened the door. Funny. She wasn't in bed. It looked like she had already woken up.

I looked around the house a bit before I decided she wasn't home.

Then I heard a car horn outside.

I opened the front door to be greeted by a horrifying sight.

Melissa was in the driveway behind the wheel of a moving truck.

"Oh no…" I shook my head to keep from laughing as she stuck her tongue out at me.

"How did you get that? You don't have a license!" This was ridiculous _and _amusing.

"I flirted with the rental guy." She sounded proud of herself.

"You can't even drive!" By now I was trying hard not to laugh and failing miserably.

"I got here didn't I?" She rolled her eyes.

"Did you kill anybody on your way?"

"No!" She sounded offended. "Well, I almost ran this guy down…and that tree came out of nowhere!"

I couldn't stop myself as I burst out laughing.

"I am not getting into that thing with you." I crossed my arms over my chest and shook my head rapidly.

"Yes you are." She had a big goofy smile on her face as she adjusted her sunglasses.

"Oh no. No, no, no." I continued to shake my head.

"Fine then…no ice cream." She was just teasing me now.

"I'll get my shoes!" I laughed a bit more as I pulled on my black converse and made sure Cody had food and water. I tossed him a few more treats as I pulled the door shut behind me.

'I'm gonna die' I though as I got in the passenger seat.

"Buckle up." She commanded happily. I had already started buckling myself in. I pulled the seat belt a few times to make sure it wouldn't budge. No taking chances in a situation like this.

"Here we go!" She stuck her tongue out slightly as she slowly backed out of the driveway. The rest of the trip was a little blurry…probably because I spent the whole ride covering my eyes.

We finally made it to the furniture store and we began looking through couches.

After about an hour of looking through countless ones, we finally settled on a beige one. It was very comfortable and very spacious.

We got two of the workers to haul it into the back as we went up to the front desk to pay for it.

"Have a nice day." The counter-girl waved us goodbye as we walked out the building.

As soon as we got back in the car, I buckled my seatbelt and covered my eyes again.

"Oh come on! I'm not that bad!" She was trying to sound indignant again.

"You almost ran over someone…on their porch!" I couldn't believe someone was that horrible a driver. No wonder she didn't have a license.

"Uh-oh."

"What uh-oh?" I couldn't wait to hear this…

"No problem. We just need gas….look over there! A gas station!" My eyes averted to the left to see…the DX station.

"Can't we find somewhere else?" I begged as she steered the car into the gas station.

"No. We'll run out of gas." She stopped the car in front of the place and looked at me expectantly.

"Well?" She finally asked.

"Well, what?" No way was I getting out.

"Someone has to stay with the 'running' car and someone has to pay. Since I'm the driver, go pay." She was rolling her eyes again.

"No offense, but even I'm a better driver than you. And I've never even driven!" I was not getting out of this truck.

"Unless you want to steal the gas, you better go pay." She was amused. I could tell.

"I don't have any money." I had her there.

She reached into her pink purse and pulled out some money.

I sighed and took it from her before I exited the truck.

"Get some candy!"

Steve had just finished pumping the gas and looked up at me as I stepped out.

He just stood there staring. Steve was Soda's man, through and through. After a few seconds he looked at me coldly and went back to working. I rolled my eyes at him and walked toward the building.

I saw Soda standing at the counter looking bored. I slipped past his view as I walked down the isle with the candy. I grabbed a few bars before I walked over to the counter.

He looked up as I approached the register. His eyes narrowed at me.

"Have fun last night?" He sounded disgusted.

I tossed the candy on the counter.

"Excuse me?" I wasn't trying to sound angry. I _was_ angry.

"Sandy said you looked pretty cozy with a few guys." He grumbled at me as he began ringing up the candy.

"Well, Sandy is an idiot." I plastered a sarcastic smile on my face and he looked furious. He looked like he was going to say something totally different, but he seemed to have changed his mind.

"You don't even know her." He shook his head and began typing things into the register.

"I know her a bit more than you do." I smirked at him as he put my candy in a bag. He mumbled something I couldn't understand as he sat the bag on the counter and told me the total.

"I wonder what she was doing at that party last night…all alone." I tried to sound innocent as I handed him the money.

"Shut up, Joey." He was back to grumbling.

"You know how many guys were at that party? Cute ones, too." I wiggled my eyebrows at him as ge just glared at me.

"Well, you would know. You probably slept with half of them." He smirked as he looked up at me. He looked surprised when he saw my face. Once again, I couldn't restrain myself, and tears had started spilling.

"So now I'm a whore _and_ a bad friend?" I couldn't believe him.

He seemed to compose himself a bit.

"What do you expect, Joey?" His eyes were wide. "First Dallas, and now all these other guys? What am I supposed to call you?" He sounded incredulous. I shouldn't have said what I spurted out next, but I couldn't help myself.

"So that's what this is about. You're jealous." I put a sadistic smile on my face. Now _he_ looked indignant.

"What are you talking about, Joey?" He rolled his eyes and shook his head slightly.

"You were spying on my at that party months ago, and you got jealous when you saw me and Dally. Then you have to go and cry about it to Darry when you think nobody's around the next afternoon and pretend you're happy with your slut Sandy."

His eyes went wide and he was speechless.

I turned around and left the store.

Now he knows what its like to be walked out on.

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Let me know what you guys think.


	17. Burn

0Important0 Hey guys! 0Important0

I just wanted everyone to recall that Joey has told Soda that she knows what he said to Darry after that party where Joey…ahem...'jumped' Dallas. If you'll go back and look (Unless you already remember)

Joey said ""You were spying on my at that party months ago, and you got jealous when you saw me and Dally. Then you have to go and cry about it to Darry when you think nobody's around the next afternoon-" So now Soda knows that Joey knows that he loved her. That's why he was so speechless.

Just making sure everyone knows so there won't be any confusion.

American-Soldier-Kyo-Curtis: Thanks for the review and for all the compliments. They were very kind.

Blondie 24-7: I know. Joey power! Thanks for reviewing.

Ex's and Oh's: Uh…Thanks for the review.

st.elmo-lover: Heck yes. Go Joey! And yeah, the guys will be back. Have no fear! Joey needs buddies. ) Especially after you see what happens next… Thanks so much for reviewing.

Kait-Lynn23: I know it was mean, but I've gotta side with Joey. Soda hasn't been very nice to her. He had it coming. Lol. Thanks for reviewing.

ForzaAzzurri09: I know! Don't worry…I think I have a good idea. Thanks for the support.

Nellie: Thank you. I like the new guys, too. Lol. They'll be back soon. I'm going to keep it in Joey's point of view though. It's a good suggestion, but I think its best to just know what Joey is thinking. It adds to the mystery and stuff. Haha. Thanks for reviewing.

TIM'N DALLYS GURL: I know. Sometimes you just have to punch back. Thanks for the support.

SodaNDallysgrl410: Haha. Thanks for the review. It was funny AND nice.

Kaligirl05: My thoughts exactly. Thanks for reviewing.

Rugrats101: I know. It was so mean. They just keep hurting each other. How rude! Lol. Thanks for the review.

mushs-grl13: Lol. I love Mickey D's. Thanks for the review.

Okay guys…this chapter is going to be…a bit of a chance. I don't know if you'll like it. You'll let me know?

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The next day was going by rather quickly considering the events. Or lack thereof.

I just sat on my porch thinking from sunrise until sundown.

I didn't mean to tell Soda everything like that. Now he knew that I had heard what he told Darry those months ago.

It wasn't _entirely_ my fault. If he would have told me instead of Darry, we wouldn't be having this problem now.

You know, for someone who's Sodapop Curtis free, I'm not any better off than I was before. I was much happier being only his friend, rather than his enemy.

Now everything was out in the open. Well…almost everything. It wasn't really a known fact to _everyone_ that I was in love with Soda.

Me, Darry, and Soda, _were_ the only ones who knew how Soda used to feel about me. Granted, I wasn't supposed to hear and not many people knew I did.

I didn't think the fact that Soda loved me was a secret anymore though. He'd probably told Steve and Darry about our conversation yesterday. And I'm sure word had spread to all the gang.

Everyone probably heard about all of those mean things I'd said to Soda. Hopefully they knew what he said to me, too. I couldn't afford to lose the few friends I had now.

"Hey, I found it!" I looked to my right to see three very familiar boys approaching my house.

"No, I found it you moron. You just ran ahead." Andy smacked Nathan on the back of the head.

"No, I believe I found it." Alex stepped out in front of them and plopped on the porch beside me.

Andy and Nathan grumbled as they sat on the bottom step.

"Hey." I greeted them happily and kindly. I wanted them to like me.

"Okay, okay. Me and the guys have a bet." Alex started. "I say, you can't possibly be as fun when you're sober, and they say you can. So who wins?" He looked at me expectantly.

I didn't really know how to answer him. I just laughed.

"Sounds about the same to me." Nathan laughed with me.

"I don't know…" Alex shook his head. "You can't really be sure. Say something funny!" He shot off the step beside me and pointed down at me.

"Um…Your fly's undone?"

He looked down and noticed that his fly was indeed undone.

He laughed sheepishly as he zipped it back up. At this point, Andy and Nathan were rolling on the ground laughing.

Andy composed himself first.

"You'll have to excuse Alex. He doesn't have all his cornflakes in one bowl." Andy patted Alex on the shoulder as he watched Nathan recover.

"All foam, no beer." Nathan muttered while he tried to sit up.

Alex faked being offended.

"What are talking about, Nathan? You couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel." Alex smirked at Nathan as he crossed his arms behind his head.

Andy fell over laughing.

Alex pointed at him and put his arm around Joey's shoulders and began mocking Andy for what he had said earlier.

"You'll have to excuse Andy, he fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down."

Andy just kept laughing which made me laugh even more.

"Okay, since I can see we all have a nice, sober sense of humor; we don't have to get drunk." Nathan finally got everyone serious long enough to make a suggestion. "So let's go see a movie."

We all agreed so I went into the house to tell Melissa I was leaving and grabbed my shoes and my hat.

We joked on each other as we walked to the nightly double. When we arrived I was surprised to see the guys pull out their wallets and pay. Thankfully, they paid for me too so I wouldn't have to sneak in alone or have to tell them that I didn't have any money. If I would have thought about it, I would have asked Melissa for some money.

Still, it was odd to see them pay. I'd never paid for a movie here.

When we took our seats I was still thinking about it.

"Why didn't we just sneak in?" They looked at me oddly and exchanged weird glances with each other. They looked uncomfortable.

"Um…Can we talk about it later?" Andy was the one who spoke.

"Sure…" I turned my attention to the movie. I had a feeling Andy didn't have any intention of talking about it later and I wasn't going to push. If they were doing something illegal for money, it wasn't any of my business. Greasers do all sorts of illegal things. Example: Sneaking into movies.

I was sitting on the end of the isle and I felt someone hit my elbow as they passed.

"Sorry" The person mumbled as they turned around.

To my horror, it was Soda. He looked horrible. He had bags under his eyes and his hair was a mess.

"What are you doing here?" He sounded angry already. This had to be a record for me. "Here to hurt me some more?"

"I should ask you the same question." I replied just as coldly. I looked behind him and noticed I had an audience. In the row behind Soda were Two-Bit, Steve, Johnny, and Pony. They were all observing with interest.

"Who's that?" He pointed a finger at Andy who was beside me. "One of your boyfriends?" He was smirking at me.

"He's a friend…not that it's any of your business." I did my best to keep my voice calm.

Soda's eyes were narrowed at me.

"Jealous again?"

He shook his head and mumbled. "Shut up, Joey. You're not that great."

"No," I stood up. "You're pathetic Soda. It's not my fault you're in love with me or something." I gave him a bored look as I took my seat, never taking my eyes off of him.

He looked hurt. Very hurt. He didn't look very cheery when he arrived, but I don't think I've ever seen Soda that torn up. I hate to admit it, but it broke my heart to see him like that. It didn't matter though. There was nothing I could do now.

He stared at me for a minute before he turned around and left.

I felt horrible with myself as each of my friends passed in front of me to follow him.

Steve and Pony glared at me as he walked past. Johnny just kept his head down, but when Two-Bit passed by was the worst.

He just stared at me and shook his head as he said a few words before he left.

I felt like dying. I told Andy, Alex, and Nathan everything I recalled about what happened with me and Soda over the last year. After that, I told them I'd see them later and I headed home.

I practically crawled into bed when I arrived. I didn't even bother taking my shoes off.

As I lay there waiting for sleep to claim me, I couldn't knock the words that Two-Bit had said to me before he left.

"That was cold, Joey. Real cold."

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Kinda short and I know, I know. That was so mean of Joey, but it had to happen. You'll see. It part of yet another chain of events.

Let me know what you guys think.


	18. Shame

mIsS sHoWjUmPeR: Haha. Well, I _am _updating now. Lol. Thanks for reviewing.

TIM'N DALLYS GURL: Don't worry. Like I said before, everything will work itself out soon. Thanks for the support.

Sodapop's#1gurl: You're probably going to be sad to hear that this is just the beginning of a huge problem. Its probably going to seem anticlimactic now that I said 'huge', but its going to have a big impact on the story.

Miranda: I know. How mean! But he had it coming. Thanks for reviewing.

Kait-Lynn23: I'm going as fast as I can. Lol. Thanks for the reviews.

NellieGURL: Well, you see, he's not really a peacemaker. He's just not really choosing sides. Well, he wasn't choosing sides. We'll just have to see what happens now.

SodaNDallysgrl410: Haha. Ol' Dally will certainly play a bigger part in the drama soon. (WINK) Thanks for reviewing.

SuperSka: Yes, but she did call him pathetic and basically said she didn't love him because she was really cold to him when she admitted that she knew that he was and probably still is (according to Joey) in love with her. Thanks for the review and the support. I'm glad you liked the chapter.

Baby-Beky77: Everyone in the gang will reveal their true side soon. No more of this back and fourth crap. Sides will be taken. Mwa ha ha! Thanks for reviewing.

FallenAngelx3: Thank you for the compliment. That was very sweet of you. And thanks for the review.

American-Soldier-Kyo-Curtis: Yes. Cranking up the heat! Wha-hoo! Lol. Thanks for reviewing.

mushs-grl13: I know. How sad! It had to happen though. Thanks for reviewing.

Nellie: You'll find out soon. Thanks for reviewing.

ForzaAzzurri09: Lol. Thank you. I've been trying to put out as many chapters I could before school started. I tend to loose sight of just about everything when school starts. At this rate, I'll probably have it done by the time school comes. Which is like a week. I'm not promising anything but it seems like a reasonable goal and it appears to be the climax of the story right about now. I'm just bringing it to a slow closure. (With a few more surprises!) Thanks for reviewing.

Blondie 24-7: I know. But! I have a few good ideas and I think I KNOW what needs to be done. Thanks for reviewing.

Rugrats101: I know! That friends till the end thing didn't hold up too well did it? Lol. Thanks for reviewing again. I love hearing from you!

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I woke up around noon the next day. I didn't even bother feeling disgusted with myself. There was nothing I could do about the things I'd said and I was sick and tired of punishing myself when it didn't do any good.

I expected to be greeted by Dallas at some point in the next couple of days, or even Two-Bit, but I hadn't seen anyone from the gang for days. I expected word had spread of my unkind words to Soda and now everyone hated me.

Andy, Alex, and Nathan came around almost every day for a week after the movie. They all seemed uncomfortable about what had happened that night with Soda, but I told them to forget about it.

A few days later while we were sitting around my yard in the dark, Andy cleared his throat and waited for everyone to quit insulting each other and laughing before he started speaking.

"Um…Joey, there's something we really need to tell you." I had a feeling this had something to do with them paying for that movie we went to.

"Look, if this is about paying for that movie-"

"It is." Alex nodded his head.

"Don't bother telling me. It's none of my business what you guys do. All greasers do illegal things and I don't care." There was something more to it.

"No, but you will care when we tell you." Nathan looked sad as he shook his head and stood up.

"Come on, Joey," Nathan started, "we're going to show you something."

With that, they turned and lead the way down the road. Reluctantly, I followed them. I couldn't understand what was so bad about how they got that money. They probably thought I looked down on stealing or something. Either way, I was going to find out soon.

We walked for half an hour before I noticed we were slowly approaching soc territory.

"Guys…" Andy raised an eyebrow at me.

"We can't go over there…it's not safe for us."

Alex laughed a little. "I think we'll be alright."

The three boys lead the way. Eventually we stopped in front of a big white house. Nathan shoved his hands in his pockets as he nodded towards it.

It took me a few minutes, but then everything seemed to piece itself together.

"You live here?" I pointed an accusing finger at Nathan.

"No." He shook his head a little with a sad smile on his face.

Andy raised his hand as if to ask permission to speak. "I do."

"So you're telling me-"

"Yes. By Oklahoma standards, I am a soc." He crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned against a street post. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"And you two?" I was getting angry.

Alex and Nathan both pointed to big houses down the road.

"So all this time-"

"Joey,-" Andy looked helpless.

"No. You lied to me." I crossed my arms as I glared at each of them.

This time, Nathan spoke.

"Joey, you don't understand. Would you have ever said another word to us if we told you where we lived?"

"Yet, you thought I'd still talk to you after you lied to me for so long?" I shook my head as I turned around and began walking home. I felt betrayed.

I heard Nathan yell something at me as I walked away. I didn't hear what he said, but I made out the words 'dangerous', 'stubborn', and 'girl'. I didn't care. I was lied to.

After about ten minutes of walking, I felt horribly stupid for coming back alone. I crossed my arms over my chest as I cautiously looked over my shoulders. I was relieved when I got out of soc territory unharmed, but I wasn't as lucky on greaser turf.

I heard a low voice to my right. I quickly turned my head in that direction. Nothing. I picked up my pack a little as I kept looking over my shoulder. Perhaps I was being paranoid from all the stories I'd heard the guys tell about shady guys who liked to lurk around in packs at night.

The next voice I heard was defiantly close. I knew I wouldn't have time to turn around. I just sprang forward.

At that moment, I knew what Nathan was yelling about. He was telling me it wasn't safe to be walking alone. I wish I would have stayed long enough to hear him properly.

I had to give myself credit. I made it pretty far before they caught up with me. A tall, black haired guy with leather jacket grabbed my hair and jerked me backwards. I cried out in pain as another slammed me into a wire fence.

I couldn't stop the tears from spilling. All I could think was "I'm going to die." Over and over.

"Don't you know little things like you shouldn't be out this late?" One with especially greasy hair was close to me as he said this; I could smell his horrible breath. I felt like throwing up. I looked around me and counted six of them.

The taller one with the leather jacket brought a switchblade from his pocket and clicked it open. I gasped when it sprung out of the handle.

He laughed at me.

"I won't use it unless I have to."

I took this opportunity to knee the smelly one in the groin and push past the one with the blade. I got pretty far this time. I was so close to home, I could see the Curtis house.

My hair was yanked back again as I let out a scream.

Everything went in slow motion as I saw the Curtis door burst open and seven very familiar greasers pile out. They all ran towards us.

I was surprised beyond belief to see Soda leading the boys.

The fight was very short. The switchblade was knocked from 'leather jacket's hand and he was beaten senseless before he turned and scurried off with the rest of his boys.

At some point, I'd fallen onto the pavement. I pushed myself off of the ground and looked at the boys.

Darry, Steve, Pony, and Johnny turned and left. Two-Bit stood and shook his head a moment before following. I guess I lost Two-Bit when I said those things to Soda.

Soda stared at me angrily before he kicked the discarded switchblade so hard it flew and buried itself deep into a tree. With that, he turned in the opposite direction of his house and stormed off.

I looked to Dally to see he had taken out a cigarette and was leaning against a tree. I turned back to watch the retreating figures of Darry, Steve, Johnny, and Pony as they went back into the Curtis house. I guess I knew who my friends are. I could feel a few tears go down my face.

I looked back to Dally to watch him put out his cigarette. Surprisingly, he didn't look very sympathetic when he saw my face.

"What are you doing, Joey?" He sounded angry. I was scared. I'd never been on the receiving end of Dally's anger and I wasn't exactly enthused to be on it now.

"Dally-"

He shook his head and roughly grabbed my shoulders forcing me to watch Soda as he walked down the road.

"You see that?" He pointed his finger at Soda. I slowly nodded.

"You did that." He spun me back around to face him.

"Dally-" I tried again.

"You know what the difference between you and Soda is?" I shook my head 'no'.

"When he hurts you, he doesn't know you feel it. When you hurt him, you want him to feel it." He let go of my shoulders and leant back against the tree.

"No Dally, you haven't heard the things he's said to me-"

"It doesn't matter, Joey!" He looked furious and on the edge of hysterical. "What did you expect him to do after you were so harsh on him?" He shook his head. "You brought this on yourself, Joey. You've got to stop hurting yourself because you're setting a bad example for Soda." With that, he turned and walked into the Curtis house.

It took me a few minutes to figure out what he meant by setting a bad example, but I got it eventually. I was hurting myself by saying those things to Soda. Dally was trying to tell me that Soda was hurting himself, too.

I ran off in the direction Soda had gone.

I saw him walking with his hands in his pockets. His steps were long and fast. I could tell by his walk that he was still angry.

"Soda!" I approached him as he turned around.

"What do you want now?" He looked _and_ sounded defeated.

"You remember my fourteenth birthday party?"

He sighed. "Joey-"

"Do you!" I had a point to make and I was most defiantly going to make it.

"Yes." He looked puzzled and angry.

"Do you remember saying something along the lines of, 'I've got to go. You don't mind do you?'" I mocked him as I stepped a bit closer. I watched in shock as Soda finally exploded.

"You want to know why I left?" I only gulped in response.

"I left because I couldn't stand to be around you and not have you!"

Then he began mocking me.

"You remember when I told you my girlfriend broke up with me that same night? _I_ broke up with _her_ because she wasn't the girl I wanted!"

I stared at him for a few seconds before I found my voice.

"Why didn't you just tell me the truth?" I was just barely managing to hold back the tears now. He looked at me incredulously.

"Because I was afraid you'd hurt my feelings…Because I was afraid you'd do what you're doing now!

I blinked a few times before I cleared my throat.

"I'm sorry." My voice sounded so small I felt like a child.

His eyes widened and he shook his head at me.

"You're sorry?" He glanced at me as I nodded my head.

"That doesn't change anything, Joey." Oh no. He was angry again.

"I said I was sorry." My voice croaked a bit as I repeated myself.

"You know what's sorry?" He shook his head again. "I was in love with my _best_ friend and she shoved it in my face. But that's not the sorry part; the sorry part is I'm still in love with her _and _I hate her."

I stood there with my mouth open. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"I broke up with Sandy the day after you came to the gas station. You were right. I was jealous and I couldn't be around Sandy anymore. I was already a wreck when we got to the movies, but you had to make it worse, didn't you?" He was yelling at this point.

I still couldn't do anything but watch with my mouth open.

"You _knew_ I was in love with you can you called me pathetic!" He got closer and closer to me with every word so his voice would have an even bigger impact on me.

He paused for a moment before adding in a more calm, yet just as angry voice, "And you still have the nerve to say you're sorry."

After he said that, he turned and went back to his house. I could feel the top of my shirt getting soaked with tears as I watched him leave.

With my head down, I walked back home to go to bed.

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Well, Joey has managed to make herself 'friendless'. Let me know what you guys think.


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